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His Car Quotes by Bill Engvall
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More Quotes by Bill Engvall
Bill Engvall has 26 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:
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My wife and I had an argument last week that was so stupid, that it bears repeating. My wife collects twist ties...welcome…
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There's a group in California that wants to make suicide a capital offense punishable by death. That's like punishing someone for being…
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I called my wife up on the cell phone and said baby you aint gonna believe this, i go, we just hit…
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I go "I just want a cup of black coffee." She goes "Do you want to try a biscotti? They're from Italy…
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He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot."…
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I've come up with the three things you never want to hear at your kid's parent/teacher conference. Number one: 'You're only responsible…
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Ketchup is great on hamburgers, but if some gets on your shirt, that does not make your shirt also a hamburger.
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I might have tried bungee jumping, until I saw that video of that guy whose cord came untied. He didn't know it…
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So finally, on about the fifteenth tee, I hit the drive of my life. And any of you people who play golf,…
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Hat's why they're man's best friend. 'Cause guys want buddies that are dumber than they are. So do women, but they've already…
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This guy from L.A. sits down next to me, and he says 'you like baseball?' I said, 'Oh, man, I love baseball.'…
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I hit two trees and fell down a ditch. And that was just walking from the lodge.
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More His Car Quotes
Popular His Car quotes from across the collection:
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I don't put myself on Jeff Beck's level, but I can relate to him when he says he'd rather be working on…
— Ritchie Blackmore
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I remember being at Greenblatt's on Sunset, and some guy just walked straight up to me, and he had some bling on…
— Yvonne Strahovski
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... If we consider the difference between William Henry Jackson packing in his camera by mule, and the person stepping for a…
— Robert Adams
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Keith Moon, God rest his soul, once drove his car through the glass doors of a hotel, driving all the way up…
— Pete Townshend
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A few years ago I was at a party and this guy threw me over his shoulder, ran across the street, put…
— Rachel Bilson
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I go on the bus, I walk. A friend left his car recently at my house and I took it out one…
— Vincent Kartheiser
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Why did Mitt Romney strap his dog to the roof of his car? Could it be because his station wagon was full…
— Bill Maher
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He actually believes that she was murdered. The reality is, of course, also, that his car, his driver, were involved in this…
— Unknown Author
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Duane Allman was one of the best there ever was ... when you listen to him, you are hearing a truly gifted…
— Richard Betts
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Sarah Palin is now the guy who hangs out in the high school parking lot, showing off his car, five years after…
— Rachel Maddow
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A tourist is a fellow who drives thousands of miles so he can be photographed standing in front of his car.
— Unknown Author
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Frank knew that no man had ever crossed the desert on foot and lived to tell about it. So, he decided to…
— Jack Handey
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