"He knows all the golf lingo. You know?……" — Bill Engvall
"He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot.""
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Bill Engvall
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23 Quotes by Bill Engvall
Bill Engvall has 23 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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My wife and I had an argument last week that was so stupid, that it bears repeating. My wife collects…
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There's a group in California that wants to make suicide a capital offense punishable by death. That's like punishing someone…
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I called my wife up on the cell phone and said baby you aint gonna believe this, i go, we…
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I go "I just want a cup of black coffee." She goes "Do you want to try a biscotti? They're…
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I've come up with the three things you never want to hear at your kid's parent/teacher conference. Number one: 'You're…
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Ketchup is great on hamburgers, but if some gets on your shirt, that does not make your shirt also a…
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I might have tried bungee jumping, until I saw that video of that guy whose cord came untied. He didn't…
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So finally, on about the fifteenth tee, I hit the drive of my life. And any of you people who…
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Hat's why they're man's best friend. 'Cause guys want buddies that are dumber than they are. So do women, but…
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This guy from L.A. sits down next to me, and he says 'you like baseball?' I said, 'Oh, man, I…
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I hit two trees and fell down a ditch. And that was just walking from the lodge.
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Go 'it wasn't my fault, it was Captain Morgan!' And my wife goes 'Oh, like when Jose Cuervo made you…
See all 23 quotes by Bill Engvall »
More All Quotes
This quote is filed under All Quotes,
one of 128,558 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Total loyalty is possible only when fidelity is emptied of all concrete content, from which changes of mind might naturally…
— Hannah Arendt
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No cause is left but the most ancient of all, the one, in fact, that from the beginning of our…
— Hannah Arendt
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The ultimate end of human acts is eudaimonia, happiness in the sense of living well, which all men desire; all…
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The new always happens against the overwhelming odds of statistical laws and their probability, which for all practical, everyday purposes…
— Hannah Arendt
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Where all are guilty, no one is; confessions of collective guilt are the best possible safeguard against the discovery of…
— Hannah Arendt
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We have almost succeeded in leveling all human activities to the common denominator of securing the necessities of life and…
— Hannah Arendt
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I keep my friends as misers do their treasure, because, of all the things granted us by wisdom, none is…
— Pietro Aretino
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We must all make peace so that we can all live in peace.
— Jean-Bertrand Aristide
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The spirit of Ubuntu, that once led Haiti to emerge as the first independent black nation in 1804, helped Venezuela,…
— Jean-Bertrand Aristide
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As we all know, many people remain buried under tons of rubble and debris, waiting to be rescued. When we…
— Jean-Bertrand Aristide
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Wise people, even though all laws were abolished, would still lead the same life.
— Aristophanes
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A friend to all is a friend to none.
— Aristotle
See all 128,558 All Quotes »