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Got Quotes by Nikhil Saluja
- I just got a tattoo of a toilet on my chest, when I take off my shirt you better recognize that I'm the shit.
- Got rejected for a job as a car salesman. Apparently A professional in fake laughing and bullshit wasn't what they were looking for.
- Meanwhile last night on facebook another girl got engaged, must unfriend her now.
- You've got higher grades than mine, not because you're smarter than me, but because I'm lazier than you.
- If your girlfriend still looks good in her Driving License ID, she'll still look good after marriage. You've got a survivor there.
- If she skipped over that good morning text and tweeted before responding, you haven't got her yet.
- In case you're wondering, last night I had a dream that my penis got chronically depressed and decided to commit suicide.
- Why are you so funny? If she asks this question, you got her. She is yours.
- You haven't got her till she saves your name in her contacts with an emoji next to it.
- I got 99 donuts 'cause a bitch ate one.
- When she starts naturally calling you babe to the point where she doesn't even notice, you got her. You won.
- My car broke down outside Pizza Hut last night. So I ordered a pizza to be delivered to my house and got a lift from…
- Hey that's not fair! - A dumb bitch realizing she got bad directions to the fair.
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- I didn't volunteer for the rodeo. I got roped into it.
- WIFE, A lady who is much like an angler -- each think the best one got away;
- When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
- Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore... A friend of mine was wearing one yesterday when he got stabbed by the woman's husband.
- A thief who stole a calendar . . . got twelve months.
- I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
- Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
- The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
- What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine.
- She got fired from the hot dog stand for putting her hair in a bun.
- No matter how bad your day is going, just remember that somewhere in the world someone just got a pubic hair in their coffee.
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