Census Bureau Quotes by Conan O'Brien

More Quotes by Conan O'Brien

Conan O'Brien has 151 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

• The hockey lockout of 1994 - 1995 has been settled. They have stopped bickering... and can now get down to some serious…
• There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right?
• Texas is reportedly going to give college students the right to carry guns on campus. So I guess that next semester, every…
• The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts.
• Real life is about reacting quickly to the opportunity at hand, not the opportunity you envisioned. Not thinking and scheming for the…
• Earlier today, the White House released President Bush's tax return. Not surprisingly, under dependents, the president listed Iraq
• Scientists say because of global warming they expect the world's oceans to rise four and a half feet. The scientists say this…
• Al Gore announced he is finishing up a new book about global warming and the environment. Yeah, the first chapter talks about…
• By the power invested in me by the state of New York and the Universal Life Church, I now pronounce you husband…
• Lenscrafters is upset with Tea Partier Michele Bachmann because she called Planned Parenthood 'the Lenscrafters of abortion.' Lenscrafters released a statement today…
• President Obama , I guess, is starting to confess to some of his anxieties. In a recent interview, President Obama said, 'I…
• Today, possible presidential candidate Donald Trump released his birth certificate. It lists his eyes as blue and his hair as ridiculous.

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