All Ogden Nash Quotes
- They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of bread-lines. And they philanthropically cure them all… All
- Women would rather be right than reasonable. Funny
- One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence. Inspirational
- Remorse is violent dyspepsia of the mind. Dyspepsia
- I claim there ain't Another Saint As great as Valentine. Claim
- Then here's to the heartening wassail, Wherever good fellows are found; Be its master instead of its vassal, and order the glasses around. Drinking
- I drink because she nags, she said I nag because he drinks. But if the truth be known to you, He's a lush and she's… Drink
- Here's a toast to the roast that good fellowship lends, with the sparkle of beer and wine; May its sentiment always be deeper, my friends,… Beer
- Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as a legislature, Sleep is as forward as hives or goiters, And where it is least… Desired
- Bankers are just like anybody else, only richer Anybody
- People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it. Fond
- Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave, when they think that their children are naive. Children
- People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up. Down
- Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor. Been
- Here lies my past, Goodbye I have kissed it; Thank you kids, I wouldn't have missed it. Good Bye
- Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them. Acquiring
- No matter how deep and dark your pit, how dank your shroud, their heads are heroically unbloody and unbowed. Dank
- Happiness is having a scratch for every itch. Every Itch
- The reason for much matrimony is patrimony. Matrimony
- All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart. Alike
- I'm like a backward berry, Unripened on the vine, For all my friends are fifty, And I'm only forty-nine. All
- Certainly there are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny- Have you ever tried to buy them without money? Buy
- There are two kinds of people who blow through life like a breeze, And one kind is gossipers, and the other kind is gossipees. Blow
- I don't mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it, but I do think that they damn well… Admit
- Stuyvesant chats with Kelly and Katz, The professor warms to the broker, And life is good in the brotherhood Of an air-conditioned smoker. Air