Best Groucho Marx Quotations
- Firefly: Where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Firefly: I'll bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with… Arms
- I am a man and you are a woman. I can't think of a better arrangement. Arrangement
- Women should be obscene, not heard. Heard
- If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham. Eggs
- This would be a better place for children if parents had to eat spinach. Better
- Be open minded, but not so open minded that your brains fall out. Brain
- I shall drink no # wine before it's time! OK, it's time. Drink
- I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it. Day
- Money will not make you happy, and happy will not make you money. Happiness
- Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed,… Bachelor
- Love had forged ahead so swiftly that in no time it had displaced agriculture as the leading industry of the period. To anyone who has… Agriculture
- Firefly: Now that you're Secretary of War, what kind of an army do you think we oughta have? Chicolini: Well, I tell you what I… Army
- Celebrate the cracks, because that's how the light comes in. Celebrate
- I'd like to meet the person who invented sex and see what they're working on now. Inspirational
- I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried… Book
- I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a good book. ANOTHER… Another Version
- A thing that has always baffled me about women is that they will saturate themselves with a pint of perfume, a pound of sachet powder,… Always Baffled
- Here lies Groucho Marx and Lies and Lies and Lies P.S. He never kissed an ugly girl. Girl
- You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you Beautiful
- You're heading for a breakdown. Why don't you pull yourself to pieces Breakdown
- You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you Canoe
- You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar Beer
- You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way Inspiration
- Yes, darling, let me cover your face with kisses-On second thought, just let me cover your face Cover
- With a little study you'll go a long ways, and I wish you'd start now Go
More Ways to Read Groucho Marx Quotes
- Best Groucho Marx Quotes (Groucho Marx Quotes)
- Best Groucho Marx Sayings (Groucho Marx Quotes)
- Best Groucho Marx Words (Groucho Marx Quotes)
- Best Groucho Marx Lines (Groucho Marx Quotes)
- Best Groucho Marx Thoughts (Groucho Marx Quotes)
- Best Groucho Marx Wisdom (Groucho Marx Quotes)
- Best Groucho Marx Proverbs (Groucho Marx Quotes)