Best Billy Connolly Sayings
- I don't believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don't want to say I don't believe in God, but… Angel
- I've always been fascinated by the difference between the jokes you can tell your friends but you can't tell to an audience. There's a fine… Audience
- Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint. Allies
- Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet. Asked
- I don't aim to offend. Aim
- I like Dali and Magritte. I also like the Scottish artist John Byrne, another surrealist. Artist
- I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days. Angeles
- I still do my comedy and my performance stuff and my acting so it's not all-consuming. But I do find myself drawing more and more… Acting
- I don't have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. I've done okay. But I usually do independent… Chasing
- I don't understand art-speak. My pictures are big doodles. I'm amazed what people come up with when they look at them. There's one of a… Amazed
- I loathe hecklers. I haven't got a good syllable to say. When you come out of the club circuit and into the concert hall, they… Circuit
- I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was… Absolutely
- I started to draw desert islands. They were just rough, shapes in the middle of the page. Then I began drawing shapes within those shapes… Amazed
- When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Course
- I think of my life as a series of moments and I've found that the great moments often don't have too much to them. They're… Complicated
- If you give people a chance, they shine. Chance
- Life is supposed to be fun. It's not a job or occupation. We're here only once and we should have a bit of a laugh. Bit
- There's no such thing as bad weather - only the wrong clothes. Bad
- When I read 'Be real, don't get caught acting,' I thought, 'How the hell do you do that?'. Acting
- I'm famous for my bottom dances, but you'll only see my bum and willy if you raise a million pounds within an hour. Bottom
- Oh aye...my Father would thrash me every now and then. He'd talk while he did it too! He'd hit me and shout, 'Have ye had… Balls
- Scottish-Americans tell you that if you want to identify tartans, it's easy - you simply look under the kilt, and if it's a quarter-pounder, you… Americans
- I always look skint. When I buy a Big Issue, people take it out of my hand and give me a pound. Always Look
- Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so waste your time and have the time of your life. Life
- I thought that you was going to retire in gozo /malta as we were going to rent your house there House
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