“There was a car in front of me driving all conservatively, and then, lo and behold, I saw that he had a Romney bumper sticker.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
Politicians study hard and work diligently their entire lives to be able to stand in front of a national audience and lie through their teeth. — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
I can say with unwavering certitude that I have never started a pint of Ben 'n Jerry's ice cream that I didn't finish in… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“When Rip Torn dies - heaven forbid - but when he dies, you'll only have to write RIP Torn.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“You're pretty great, God, and I mean that, but if it were up to me - like if I happened to be YOU -… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“The start of a run is like the start of a writing session: First you resist, then you threaten to quit, then you roll… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“A pure heart faces the worst kind of evil in this world. But as it sleeps it's blessed, and it wakes up cleansed and… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“If in answer to your inner voice screaming 'don't do it', you shake your head and do it anyway, I can guarantee your days… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Did the guy who invent the shower cap also invent the fitted bed sheet?” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“All great art is almost never received well initially; don't quit before the world opens its eyes.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Live your life somewhere in between Ayn Rand and Mother Theresa. It's just as important to better yourself as it is to better others.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Sade pretty much summed up life in seven words: 'It's only love that gets you through.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“People who put avocados in the fridge are basically saying, 'I want to eventually experience something less amazing.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“If you really want to seriously piss some people off, follow your heart.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Southern Californians freak out when it rains, yet when there's an earthquake they're like 'pass the salt.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Out of all the medical advancements in human history I'm still most in awe of that tiny little piece of toilet paper that can… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
