Never give an artist like me carte blanche: he would think it's simply toilet paper. — Maurizio Cattelan Copy Share Image
I've fixed the toilet. And I've been crawling in claustrophobic places... you have to deal with that when you become a homeowner. — J. B. Pritzker Copy Share Image
Life is a lot like toilet paper. You're either on a roll...or you're taking shit from some asshole. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Before you go to the bathroom in someones house make sure they have toilet paper…i now know — Cici Says Copy Share Image
Literature has nothing to do with usefulness; the most useful place in any house is the toilet. — Theophile Gautier Copy Share Image
Poop humor is fun. If you do the toilet scenes well and commit to them, they can be really, really powerful. — Sandra Bullock Copy Share Image
“leaving up toilet seats is for guys who have sex with their socks on.” — Nicola Rendell Copy Share Image
Hey sexy! shut the door pull down your pants, get on top of me satisfy your needs. Lot's of love your toilet — Brad D'Roza Copy Share Image
“I’d managed to repair my garbage disposal and replace the tank assembly in my toilet by browsing the almighty Google and ignoring… — Gina L. Maxwell Copy Share Image
I've cleaned toilets, and if I have to go and clean toilets again it doesn't worry me. I cleaned toilets in Southend,… — Lee Evans Copy Share Image
When I was younger I was told to lose some weight because I was a little bit chubbier, but I didn't dream… — Vogue Williams Copy Share Image
Bad writing is not easier than good writing. It's just as hard to make a toilet seat as it is a castle… — Ben Hecht Copy Share Image
“Nobody gets their period for the first time and has a nervous breakdown next to a Kohler toilet. Men have such stupid… — Jessica Park Copy Share Image
A company in Japan has developed a set of kneepads that allow men to squat down in front of the toilet, reducing… — Seth Meyers Copy Share Image
I flew back just in time to pick up a toilet seat for my girlfriend. It didn't go over that well. I… — Ben Affleck Copy Share Image
Where do you get lumpy tiles? Well, of course, you don't. But I get a lot of toilets, and so you just… — Dan Phillips Copy Share Image
In awe, I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebony void… — Les Dawson Copy Share Image
I left Israel to work as a model, to just make money - I didn't care if I was doing an ad… — Moran Atias Copy Share Image
“Once you get over the simple unpleasantness of it - I suspect most people would gag, the first time - it is… — Iain Banks Copy Share Image
“Mujo is a refugee in Germany, has no job, but has a lot of time, so he goes to a Turkish bath.… — Aleksandar Hemon Copy Share Image
I have said with as much sincerity as I can muster that if I were thrown into a dungeon with a sentence… — Edward P. Jones Copy Share Image
“So how did it go? I sat on the toilet and ran a hand over my hair. Um... it's still going, I… — Denise Grover Swank Copy Share Image
“Space Shuttle toilets have always been mounted on the floor, but you would not call them normal. The original shuttle toilet bowl… — Mary Roach Copy Share Image
We had a house in Baga, Goa, that we would visit every Christmas vacation. It was called Love House. The toilet was… — Karan Kapoor Copy Share Image
There's nothing special about losing your virginity over a toilet. — Becca Fitzpatrick Copy Share Image
