I'm not the voice of reason; I'm more the guy using these offensive topics as fodder to raise tension in a joke. — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
When once you have got hold of a vulgar joke, you may be certain that you have got hold of a subtle… — Gilbert K. Chesterton Copy Share Image
“WHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? Ah. I see we are now into the second movement of the Nakamura Suite in G-Minor!” — Kevin Sylvester Copy Share Image
If you can't laugh at yourself, you may be missing the colossal joke of the century. — Barry Humphries Copy Share Image
Being able to joke about my disability also gives me some control over it. — Alex Brooker Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when you realize your joke isn't as funny as you thought. — Alexia Copy Share Image
I'd buy joke books and try doing them at school; I always had jokes. That would be my go-to thing at parties:… — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
When I'm writing the book I'm laughing at just how overblown the characters seemed. How full of himself he seems. But I… — Jhonen Vasquez Copy Share Image
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is a joke - the fact that Madonna is in before Rush and Kiss. Those… — Corey Taylor Copy Share Image
I think more than anything, as a comedian, I grow tired of the unoriginality of 'crazy cat lady' jokes. It's a hacky… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
“Compared to the power of the sun, everything else is a joke, including all the wrenches, clockwork, springs and even your steam” — Andrius B. Tapinas Copy Share Image
“Under the ground, in Munich, Germany, two people stood and spoke in a basement. It sounds like the beginning of a joke:… — Markus Zusak Copy Share Image
Sometimes I can't think of a better way to end my day than coming home and just strumming my ukulele for a… — Jake Shimabukuro Copy Share Image
Around year seven or eight, you'd kill yourself when you realized Norm had to enter and you had to come up with… — Ted Danson Copy Share Image
Howard Stern gave me the best advice about Twitter and the N word. He said maybe onstage people get the intention behind… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
Every comic will tell you that a lot of crowds play differently to different social commentary. Some people are really uptight about… — Andrew Santino Copy Share Image
If I scored 10 goals I got 10 euros, which meant a lot of candy! It was a little bit like for… — Timo Werner Copy Share Image
There is a joke that I use all the time. I say it to my kids. I used to say it to… — Stanley Tucci Copy Share Image
I'm not making fun of it because I want to make fun of it. I'm making fun of it so I feel… — Pete Davidson Copy Share Image
The joke about SAP has always been, it's making '50s German manufacturing methodology, implemented in 1960s software technology, delivered to 1970-style manufacturing… — Marc Andreessen Copy Share Image
My brother was listening to his transistor radio. He kept switching the earpiece from one ear to the other, which I thought… — Jane Lynch Copy Share Image
It's very interesting, the joke comes first and then the wording comes within five seconds, maybe ten seconds. My thing is to… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
You never know what's coming with me: I might dance or laugh but on the pitch I am very serious. I don't… — Antonio Rudiger Copy Share Image
There's usually nothing in a guy's joke in which we have to understand what's going on in someone else's mind. — Robert Mankoff Copy Share Image
Anybody that's really close to me, they know I'm really funny and I love to joke. I can laugh at anything. — Nav Copy Share Image
I think as I get older, I'm just going to start making smooth, new age music - no joke. — Caroline Polachek Copy Share Image
We've always had a philosophy that we would always go wherever the joke is. — Jay Chandrasekhar Copy Share Image
Never take someone's feelings as a joke. You never know how much that shit hurt! — Bismark Frimpong Copy Share Image
If written with enough care and thoughtfulness, a joke can make you laugh at a belief you hold dear. — Paul F. Tompkins Copy Share Image
The joke is that U2's new record only looked like a virus. Enjoy mining bitcoins for me losers. — Thom Yorke Copy Share Image
“The average adult hates being treated like a child, unless it suits them.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
The bravest artists I've ever known have always been graf artists. Risking your life and your freedom is no joke. — El-P Copy Share Image
“A character whose name is a joke cannot be taken seriously. (Page 188)” — M.B.B. Biskupski Copy Share Image
Wanna hear a joke about your girlfriend's p*ssy? Nevermind, you'll never get it... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It was a bit of fun. But of course like anything that starts as a joke, people started to take it all… — Steven Wilson Copy Share Image
“Whether it is big or small, the size of a poor man’s yard incessantly reminds him that he is poor.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
You can't teach standup comedy. You can teach someone how to formulate a joke, but making it funny is different. — Jermaine Fowler Copy Share Image
