“You are more likely to find three TVs inside a randomly selected house than you are to find a single book that… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“I think you're crazy good at this survival stuff, Cary." His shoulders sag. He gives me a small, relieved smile and we… — Courtney Summers Copy Share Image
Do not worry about not holding high position; worry rather about playing your proper role. Worry not that no one knows of… — Confucius Copy Share Image
Im getN tired of bitches walkN around N black & white stripes lookN like Hamburglar from da McDonalds commercials — IG:catone_2_funny Copy Share Image
A dugout is much superior to a conventional manufactured canoe because you can get soaking wet without bothering to capsize it. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I think the easiest way not to fall for somebody or get a crush on them would be, you know, every night… — MattG124 Copy Share Image
Judge What is more sensual, sexier than a Cat Walk? Contestant Sir, Definitely a Komodo Dragon Walk moving his/her/its bottom 75 Degrees… — Mohit Sharma Copy Share Image
I'm very English really. I even ordered a book on the internet, 'how to have absolutely nothing to do with your neighbors'.… — Milton Jones Copy Share Image
“I felt my cheeks turn red, and she laughed out loud. But I didn't mind too much, because the last thing she… — Jessica Verday Copy Share Image
We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it pointed… — Gene Perret Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you last night. The best day of my life was when I taught you how to juggle,… — Michael Summers Copy Share Image
“YOU WILL DRINK THE COFFEE UNTIL I CAN SEE MY FACE IN THE BOTTOM OF THE CUP!” I did not mean to… — Jonathan Safran Foer Copy Share Image
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are Tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“How did you do it?" I brought the teacup to my mouth for another sip. "How did you guide Sophie's soul? I… — Rachel Vincent Copy Share Image
“When the first book out my sister-in-law read it and we were chatting at 5 o'clock in the afternoon and she said,… — Sara Sheridan Copy Share Image
“I’m trying to decide whether to tell you two to get a room or go barf in the trash can,” Emma said.… — E.J. Stevens Copy Share Image
I like to smoke a pipe, because it's the punch line indicator. Whenever I take a hit of the pipe, you should… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
You have to imagine you write a show about a sponge and you think that maybe a few people will think it… — Stephen Hillenburg Copy Share Image
“Yeah, I was thinking about taking one of those showers where you huddle in the corner fully clothed and cry," Archer offered.” — Rachel Hawkins Copy Share Image
The funny thing about living at Longleat is that there's no 'typical' day, but I usually wake up around 6:45 A. M. — Emma Weymouth Copy Share Image
I remember the book The beautiful ones are not yet born now the beautiful ones are on BBM,facebook & twitter, nobody to… — @efiosiugbore Copy Share Image
If the Japanese want to be taken seriously as world financial powers, they'd better quit using the same tailor as variety show… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
“My brain is a vast, barren, jokeless plain where wolves howl at the moon over rocky overhangs and the wind kicks up… — Craig Silvey Copy Share Image
Wikipedia's funny. Some of the stuff on there - I go there occasionally - it's unbelievable the amount of stuff that people… — Sheamus Copy Share Image
My friend said I'm childish something something. Couldn't hear the rest cause I had my fingers in my ear & was saying… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Hey attractive guy, will you smile? I think you have something on your teeth. Hold on let me take a picture to… — Amber Hope Copy Share Image
Now I'm not an expert at mathematics, but I calculated it would take at least three of me to take on one… — Dylan Moran Copy Share Image
Jesus is magic, because he turned water into wine. I think he made the statue of liberty disappear in the 80s or… — Sarah Silverman Copy Share Image
“Men came in and dragged us apart. It took us five minutes to bring Nora to. She sat up holding her cheek… — Dashiell Hammett Copy Share Image
We cannot protect something we do not love, we cannot love what we do not know, and we cannot know what we… — Richard Louv Copy Share Image
SCHOOL: 2 + 2 = 4. HOMEWORK: 2 + 4 + 2 = 8. EXAM: Juan has 4 apples, his train is 7 minutes early, calculate the suns mass — Anonymous Copy Share Image
This Bastille Day, let's pause to admire a country where leaders are celebrated for screwing hot models rather than impeached for ejaculating… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'd done drag since I was 14, for special occasions, and in 2010 a friend of mine with her own burlesque group… — Conchita Wurst Copy Share Image
Going into a game against Lew Alcindor [later Kareem Abdul-Jabbar] is like going into a knife fight and finding there's no blade… — Bill Fitch Copy Share Image
Going to gym really sucks. But I calculated, and there's a good news - I only have to go 9,972 times before… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you. You were being hung. I had a sword in one hand and a stool in the… — Bauvard Copy Share Image
Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns and… — Deuteronomy 14:21 Copy Share Image
There are many good reasons for drinking, one has just entered my head, if a man doesn't drink when he's living, how… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Goethe's thinking was not rigid with inflexible contours; it was a thinking in which the concepts continually metamorphose. — Rudolf Steiner Copy Share Image
Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted to get it for you,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
![“Going into a game against Lew Alcindor [later Kareem Abdul-Jabbar] is like going into a knife fight and finding there's no blade in your handle.” quote by Bill Fitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/701/bill-fitch-72748_basketball_going-into-a-game-against-lew-alcindor-l_1307275.png)
