My mum, a strange creature from the time when pickles on toothpicks were still the height of sophistication. — Renee Zellweger Copy Share Image
Yuzvendra Chahal, India's leg-spinner, is another IPL teammate. He's also a great guy and very funny. — Moeen Ali Copy Share Image
I'm happiest when I feel that several almost opposing sensations are present at the same time. — David Salle Copy Share Image
“A little vanilla never hurt anybody.” He nipped her ankle. “Great shoes by the way. Sexy as hell.” — Hanna Lui Copy Share Image
It's funny the way most people love the dead. Once you are dead, you are made for life. — Jimi Hendrix Copy Share Image
We have approximately 60,000 thoughts in a day. Unfortunately, 95% of them are thoughts we had the day before. — Deepak Chopra Copy Share Image
Where are my sensations? They have melted into... me, and what is this me, this self, but the sum of these evaporated… — Emile M. Cioran Copy Share Image
Learning to code is the single best thing anyone can do to get the most out of the amazing future in front… — Marc Andreessen Copy Share Image
Mom: Have you seen my daughters? guy: The really tall one and the short black one? MOM: Yeah!! thats them, where are… — Amber Smith Copy Share Image
All of my family members have had moments where they're upset with me because I'll cavalierly write a story just to be… — Adam F. Goldberg Copy Share Image
When girls have a great night out, they talk about it for months. When guys have a great night out, that night… — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this… — Murray Walker Copy Share Image
I come across as a very serious and mature girl but there is also a mad and funny side to me which… — Neha Pendse Copy Share Image
This Independence Day you're invited to my house where a large gathering of people will proudly display their dependence on drugs and… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
With one out in the first, Dave Roberts looks a lot better than the last time he pitched against the Padres! — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
I don't sit down to write a funny story. Every single thing I sit down to write is meant to be sad. — Lorrie Moore Copy Share Image
I see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
We estimate, and this isn't an estimation, that Greta Waitz is 80 seconds behind — David Coleman Copy Share Image
That Awkward Momment WhenSomeone Deletes There Comment So It Looks Like Your Talking To Your Self.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Inspiration is in seeing a part of the whole with the part of the whole in you. — Khalil Gibran Copy Share Image
What is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing. — Geoffrey Chaucer Copy Share Image
Youre supposed to be the leading lady in your own life, for Gods sake! — Kate Winslet Copy Share Image
Even when I lose faith in myself there is something in me that speaks through and says I am not finished yet. — T.I Copy Share Image
A woman will do anything to keep a pretty figure, but hardly anything to get one. — Mignon McLaughlin Copy Share Image
Whatever I do, when I'm working, I'm very serious. But after, I will play, I am funny. — Sammo Hung Copy Share Image
Scientists are trying to figure out how long human can live without a brain. You can tell them your age. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. I'm kind of funny about making new friends. — Eminem Copy Share Image
Awkwardly standing there whileyour friends talks to somebody you don't know. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A comedian is not a person who opens a funny door - he's the person who opens a door funny. — Chuck Jones Copy Share Image
The way he's swinging the bat, he won't get a hit until the 20th century. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
I have an impersonal trainer. We meet at the gym, we dont talk, he works out alone, and I go home. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
It is necessary to constantly remind ourselves that we are not an abomination. — Marlon Riggs Copy Share Image
Everybody knows what California smog is - that's fog with the vitamins removed. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
