I think God loves to hear little kids laugh at fart jokes. He didn't just make sunsets and bluebirds, He made hot… — Orson Bean Copy Share Image
I had this website that, at one point, I listed myself as 'actor, writer, comedian, and fart enthusiast' just because I thought… — Thomas Middleditch Copy Share Image
“What happened next… well, I'm going to blame it on the fact that I was scared. And I had just flown or… — Dinah Katt Copy Share Image
Just let them sit in the goddam sun. But the world won't let them because there's nothing more dangerous than letting old… — Frank McCourt Copy Share Image
Old Testament, is really one of the most wickedest books you'll ever come across. God is an insecure, rage-filled hybrid of Bobby… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I own a fart CD. It has, I believe, over 100 fart sounds. A lovely variety, from the up-close and personal to… — Simon Helberg Copy Share Image
What is like a smelly fart, that, although invisible is obvious? One's own faults, that are precisely As obvious as the effort… — 7th Dalai Lama Copy Share Image
It having been a very cold night last night I had got some cold, and so in pain by wind, and a… — Samuel Pepys Copy Share Image
Using blasphemy as entertainment is as cheap as a comedian telling a fart joke. — Katy Perry Copy Share Image
Pity, I've learned, is like a fart. You can tolerate your own, but you simply can't stand anyone else's. — Jonathan Tropper Copy Share Image
Eggs! They're not a food, they belong in no group! They're just farts clothed in substance! — Dylan Moran Copy Share Image
A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good… — Jenny Eclair Copy Share Image
In many ways, Eulah-Beulah prepared me for literary criticism. After having a two-hundred-pound babysitter fart on your face and yell Pow!, The… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
There's nothing worse than a bunch of jaded old farts, and that's a fact. — Robert Plant Copy Share Image
