Comedian Quotes · Page 17

I just respected comedians whether they were or they weren't, from, you know, new or old.

— Steve Martin

I'm always trying to find the next comedian that just gives me something a little funny to combine with all of the…

— Jesse Williams

I have always been a comedian - that has always been my job and it is what I want to do for…

— Iain Stirling

I am a product... I'm a comedian. I'm not curing cancer. In the end, I tell jokes. I make people laugh.

— Carlos Mencia

Every comedian dreams of hosting 'The Tonight Show' and, for seven months, I got to. I did it my way, with people…

— Conan O'Brien

If I've inadvertently become some sort of role model for failed comedians, then it's really backfired very badly on me.

— Jack Dee

You never have a comedian who hasn't got a very deep strain of sadness within him or her. Every great clown has…

— Margaret Rutherford

I think of a lot of comedy being watched alone, for some reason. It's surprising to me that people are getting together…

— Gary Gulman

Although I had good hand-eye coordination, I was so tall and skinny and muscularly weak that I just was not well coordinated.…

— John Cleese

Yes, there have been women in comedy. Moms Mabley was one of the earliest. She was an African American comedian; she often…

— Rebecca Traister

For generations comedians have made jokes about Scots-Irish in the South inter-breeding. "I am my own grandpa" and all that stuff; you…

— Ishmael Reed

I'm a comedian, and I definitely see the humor in a lot of things. I am also sad a lot. I cry…

— Ellen DeGeneres

I'm not really trying to be a stand-up comedian. I have a huge amount of respect for the guys who do it.…

— Blake Griffin

Whatever happens in life can happen on the stage, but as a comedian you should always be clear what your target is.…

— Ben Miller

I wanted to be like an actor or a comedian for a little while, because I was always wanting to make people…

— Gemma Ward

When a man carries a gun all the time, the respect he thinks he's getting might really be fear. So I don't…

— Andy Griffith

I feel a lot of personal responsibility to undo the negative stereotypes. I know that it's not coming from a bad place.…

— Zach Anner

Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it's inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more…

— Norm MacDonald

Has anyone seen me on Letterman? Two million people watch that show and I don't know where they are. You might have…

— Mitch Hedberg

As a comedian I don't think they look at me as a sexual person but I can see where with actors it…

— Wanda Sykes

By TV standards - I'm not comparing it to manual labor by any means - by TV comedy standards, it is the…

— Billy Eichner

It's very interesting being an artist and a comedian, (because) you aim for jobs that will feed your ego, but when you…

— Chris Gethard

Every comedian is furious. Age makes me angry. I'm unhappy at not being able to open packages anymore. I'm angry that libraries…

— Joan Rivers

I wouldn't mind gigging around the same era as Jesus, after he gives his speech about the meek and how blessed they…

— Jim Jefferies

I'm a comedian because I want people to like me. That's really why all comedians are comedians.

— Tim Minchin

I played few hero roles in the initial days of my career, but audiences loved me for my comic timing and, therefore,…

— Ali

When you left my presence, you left expedient. You ain't no fuckin killer, youse a comedian, beyotch.

— DJ Quik

Comedians dissect jokes all the time. Comedians are beautiful structuralists. But ultimately it's an athletic endeavor.

— Stephen Colbert

I better start doing stand up comedy in Spanish before every comedian in Mexico translates my jokes.

— Felipe Esparza

I wanted to do a show based on what my life would be like if I had never become a comedian.

— Drew Carey

There's a very fine line between political comedian and activist, and I don't really think I fall over into the activist category.

— Samantha Bee

I always wanted to be a stand-up comedian, even as a kid. Me and my dad would watch 'Evening at the Improv'…

— Adam DeVine

As a comedian, you're kind of like a blues musician; you have to live a little bit.

— Kevin Nealon

If you know me, I don't live in this dismal world. I mean, I like to have fun. My friends are comedians.

— Linda Blair

You just got to be really logical when you're a comedian - to a fault. Like a lawyer's got to believe in…

— Chris Rock

A comedian needs to have his own filters, needs to know his audience, how far he can push things.

— Jeff Dunham

Everyone goes "every comedian does Arnold Schwarzenegger". Yes, they do; but do they do Arnold Schwarzenegger in Brokeback Mountain?

— Pablo Francisco

It's a letdown if the comedian doesn't finally actually really sit on his hat.

— Kingsley Amis

If Mandela were a comedian, I bet he would never get mad at a heckler, he'd give him or her a hug.

— Godfrey

The optimum frequency with which comedians should do a series is every year. I do one every three years. My audience is…

— Alexei Sayle