Marriage SMS / Text Messages

LOVE YOUR HUSBAND

When he orders you to make tea or coffee.
He wants to feel fresh to listen to your nostop talks.

Love him if he looks at all the beautiful females.
He is just checking that you are still the best.

Love him if he criticize your cooking.
He is still improving his taste.

Love him if he snores at night and disturbs your sleep.
He is trying to prove that he is the most relaxed person after being married to you.

Love him if forgets to give you a gift on your birthday.
He is saving money for future.

Love him Because...
You don't have a Choice...
and killing is a legal offense

The Most Expensive Way
To Sleep With A Woman Is..
.
.
.
Marriage!

Chess says everything
about husband and wife.
The King has to take things one step at a time,
while the Queen can do whatever she wants.

If men behave after marriage the way they do before it,
half the divorces won't take place..

On the other hand,

If women behave before marriage the way they do after it,
half the marriages won't take place ;)

Q: If marriages are made in heaven,
than what are made in Hell?

Answer: The days after marriage!

Lawyer: “What was the first thing your husband
said to you when he woke that morning?‚
Witness: “He said, Where am I, Cathy?‚

Lawyer: “And why did that upset you?‚
Witness: “My name is Susan.‚

Funny Oxymoron's:

(An oxymoron is usually defined as a phrase in which two words of contradictory meaning are brought together)

1) Clearly misunderstood
2) Exact Estimate
3) Small Crowd
4) Act Naturally
5) Found Missing
6) Fully Empty
7) Pretty ugly
8) Seriously funny
9) Only choice
10) Original copies
&
the Mother of all
11) Happily Married

Some people ask the secret
of our long marriage.

We take time to go to a restaurant
two times a week.

A little candlelight, dinner, soft music
and dancing.

She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.