Wife SMS / Text Messages

Collection of wife sms jokes & text messages which includes :- wife jokes , husband and wife jokes etc...

Husband wife watching an IPL match together

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Husband wife watching an IPL match together:
After 5 minutes:

Wife: Is this Bret Lee?
Husband: No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler.

Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket.
Husband: No, this is just a replay of the last one.

Wife: Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one.
Husband: It's Bangalore vs Mumbai.

Wife: How many runs they need to win now?
Husband: 72 runs in 36 balls.

Wife: Eh! That's easy, just 2 runs in 1 ball.
Husband: *Turns off the TV*

Wife: Turns it on again and starts watching "Daily serial"

Husband: Who is girl here ?
Wife: Don't disturb me please .

I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET

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Boss hangs a poster in Office
"I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET"
He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk.
"Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home."

I'm talking to my wife

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (198 votes, average: 3.84 out of 5)
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Man outside phone booth: Excuse me !!
You are holding the phone since 20 mins.
&
haven't spoken a word..!!!
Man inside: I'm talking to my wife

A line on a Husband's T shirt

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A line written on a Husband's T shirt :
ALL GIRLS ARE DEVIL BUT MY WIFE IS QUEEN..
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OF THEM..:-P

Husband sent a text to his wife at night

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Husband sent a text to his wife at night,
"Hi I will get late, please try and wash all my dirty clothes
and make sure you prepare my favorite dish before I return."

He sent another text,
"And I forgot to tell you that I got an increase in my salary
at the end of the month I'm getting you a new car"

Shetext back, "OMG really?"

Husband replied,
"No I just wanted to make sure you got my first message".

Don't copy if u can't paste! :p

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (178 votes, average: 3.49 out of 5)
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A famous inspirational speaker said:
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"
Audience was in shock and silence..
He added: "she was my mother"
A big round of applause & laughter!

A very daring husbnd tried to crack this at home
After a dinner, he said loudly to his wife in the kitchen:
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"
standing for a moment, trying to recall the second line of that speaker

by the time he gained his senses,
he was on a hospital bed,
recovering from burns of boiling water!

Moral: don't copy if u can't paste!

2 Wise advices for married peoples

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Two Wise Advises for Married Peoples

Never laugh at your wife's choices...
(You are on of them...)

Never be Prouf of Your Choices...
(Your Wife is one of them...)

Wife comes home late at night

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Wife comes home late at night
and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.

From under the blanket
she sees four legs instead of two!

She reaches for a baseball bat
and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.

Once she's done,
she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.

As she enters,
she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. :s

"hi darling", he says,
"your parents have come to visit us,
so I let them stay in our bedroom.
Hope you have said hello to them.

A Special Package For Business Men.

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An Airline Introduced
A Special Package For Business Men.
Buy Ur Ticket Get Ur Wife's Ticket Free

After Great Success,
The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives
Asking How Was The Trip.
All Of Them Gave A Same Reply...

"Which Trip ?"

Similarity between chewing gum & begum

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What's the similarity between chewing gum & begum(wife) ??
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Both are sweet at the beginning
and
become tasteless, shapeless and chipku in the eNd...

Wife wish 2 be a newspaper

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Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
so I would be in ur hands allday.

Husband: I too wish that u were
a newspapers so I could have
a new one everyday.