Collection of wife sms jokes & text messages which includes :- wife jokes , husband and wife jokes etc...
Wife SMS / Text Messages
LOVE YOUR HUSBAND
When he orders you to make tea or coffee.
He wants to feel fresh to listen to your nostop talks.
Love him if he looks at all the beautiful females.
He is just checking that you are still the best.
Love him if he criticize your cooking.
He is still improving his taste.
Love him if he snores at night and disturbs your sleep.
He is trying to prove that he is the most relaxed person after being married to you.
Love him if forgets to give you a gift on your birthday.
He is saving money for future.
Love him Because...
You don't have a Choice...
and killing is a legal offense
wife:honey,what r u looking 4?
wife:why have u been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour ?
husband: i was just looking 4 the expiry date
Husband asks: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means...
Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
WIFE says: No darling , it means :-
With Idiot For Ever
A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.
HUSBAND and WIFE are like 2 tyres of a vehicle
If 1 punctures, the vehicle can't move further
always Keep a SPARE TYRE....
A woman went shopping, At cash counter she opened her purse to pay.
The cashier noticed a TV remote in her purse.
He cud'nt control his curiosity n asked
"Do u always carry ur TV remote with u?"
She replied " No, not always, but my husband refused to accompany me for shopping today..
The story continues....
The shopkeeper laughs and takes back all the items that lady had purchased.
Shocked at this act, she asks the shopkeeper what is he doing.
He said your husband has blocked your credit card.
MORAL : Respect the hobbies of your husband.
Wife took out his husbands credit card from purse
and uses it to clear all the bills.
Unfortunately he didn't block his own card.
Moral:...... Dont underestimate the power of a WIFE.
Women never dress up to impress man,
She dress up to irritate other women.
A man received message from his neighbour.
Sorry sir I am using your wife.
I am using day and night.
I am using when u r not present at home.
In fact I am using more than U R using.
I confess this because now I feel very much guilt.
Hope U will accept my sincere apologies.
Man went home and had a big fight with his wife.
Few minutes later he received another massage.
Sorry Sir spelling / auto correct mistake ...
it's not wife but WIFI.
Police Officer: I arrest people, But, when I go home, I'm under house arrest, by Wife
Professor: I give lectures to students, But, when I go home, I get Lectured hourly, by wife
CEO: I'm the Boss, But, when I go home, I always feel like an employee, by wife
Judge: I give Justice, but when I go home, I Beg for Justice, by wife
Husband : I found Aladin's lamp today. :P
Wife : wow, what did u ask for darling ?? :D
Husband : I asked him to increase your brain ten times..
Wife : oh..darling..luv u so much.. :-*
Did he do that ??
Husband : He laughed and said multiplication doesn't apply on zero. :P :P
Husband wife watching an IPL match together:
After 5 minutes:
Wife: Is this Bret Lee?
Husband: No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler.
Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket.
Husband: No, this is just a replay of the last one.
Wife: Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one.
Husband: It's Bangalore vs Mumbai.
Wife: How many runs they need to win now?
Husband: 72 runs in 36 balls.
Wife: Eh! That's easy, just 2 runs in 1 ball.
Husband: *Turns off the TV*
Wife: Turns it on again and starts watching "Daily serial"
Husband: Who is girl here ?
Wife: Don't disturb me please .