Contact Quote by Rita Rudner

“All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.”

Rita Rudner

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.1 out of 5 (3 ratings)

Contact Funny Guy Humor Lists Men Names Nice Nice guy Nice guys Thinking

More by Rita Rudner

I worry about Las Vegas schools. I hear in math, they only teach them to count to 21.

Rita Rudner

Image

Most men are secretly still mad at their mothers for throwing away their comic books. They would be valuable now.

Rita Rudner

Image

Going out to eat is expensive. I was out at one restaurant and they didn't have prices on the menu. Just faces with different…

Rita Rudner

Image

Men are very confident people. Even a sixty-year-old man with no arms thinks he could play in the Super Bowl if he had to.

Rita Rudner

Image

Envy the kangaroo. That pouch setup is extraordinary; the baby crawls out of the womb when it is about two inches long, gets into…

Rita Rudner

Image

The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.

Rita Rudner

Image

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one.

Rita Rudner

Image

When you're a dancer, you start with the basics. You don't all of a sudden do a grand jete and pirouette. You start with…

Rita Rudner

Image

My Vegas act is how I make my money.

Rita Rudner

Image

Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

Rita Rudner

Image

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.

Rita Rudner

Image

... life is broken down into these stages: you're born and you don't know how anything works; gradually you find out how everything works;…

Rita Rudner

Image

Explore all 217 Rita Rudner quotes

More Contact quotes

Politics in Philadelphia is a contact sport.

Michael Nutter

Image

She'd read once that if you ran into a bear in the woods you should avoid eye contact and you shouldn't run away, but…

Anne Ursu

Image

Becoming famous is a really shocking thing, especially when you don't have aspirations to it. It got to the point where I would try…

Alison Moyet

Image

Some people are like ants. Give them a warm day and a piece of ground and they start digging. There the similarity ends. Ants…

Hal Borland

Image

The Harvard Business Review recently had an article called 'The Human Moment,' about how to make real contact with a person at work: ...…

Daniel Goleman

Image

The improved American highway system isolated the American-in-transit. On his speedway he had no contact with the towns which he by-passed. If he stopped…

Daniel J. Boorstin

Image

Close contact between science and the practice of collective farms and State farms creates inexhaustible opportunities for the development of theoretical knowledge, enabling us…

Trofim Lysenko

Image

You should never feel lonely, neglected, fearful, or defeated when you remember that there are the shining ones. They are watching with keen interest…

Flower A. Newhouse

Image

Daily contact with some teachers is itself all-sided ethical education for the child without a spoken precept. Here, too, the real advantage of male…

G. Stanley Hall

Image

Emma was a shocking driver, simultaneously sloppy and petrified, and for the first fifty miles had been absent-mindedly driving with her spectacles on top…

David Nicholls