"Who wants to know what Jackie Gleason's balls……" — Nick Swardson
"Who wants to know what Jackie Gleason's balls tasted like? Yes, Cornbread."
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Nick Swardson
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34 Quotes by Nick Swardson
Nick Swardson has 34 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Babies are like the smallest, drunkest people you know.
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If you want to be a comedian, go out. Do a week in Des Moines, Iowa. Try to make those…
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Comedy is so subjective, you know what I mean? To sit there and technically pick it apart is so stupid.
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No one will ever be as good as Phil Hartman. He was such an amazing genius, and may be the…
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I moved to the Ukraine. And it was cold, and everyone had guns, and smelled like soup.
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God bless you Jimmy, God bless your heart.
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Can we take a shower and talk about this?
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Ah, you smell like a winner. You smell like USA!
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You look great Jimmy. You look amazing and your hair rocks. You look so good, oh my gosh. You look…
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Hello........Cool I hope its a naked dude with a boner.
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Fruitcup? Nice....way to go mom!
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Who wants to hear about my blowjob from the World War? Yeah...
See all 34 quotes by Nick Swardson »
More Balls Quotes
This quote is filed under Balls Quotes,
one of 1,827 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Let me put it this way: I think Republicans tend to keep the ball in play, Democrats go for broke.
— Arthur Ashe
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I don't care who you are, you're going to choke in certain matches. You get to a point where your…
— Arthur Ashe
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I guess I do prefer a ball cap. I have performed without a cap, mostly at funerals and weddings.
— Rodney Atkins
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I like to juggle with one ball at a time. Then I put the ball down and do nothing for…
— Rowan Atkinson
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It's a great day for a ball game; let's play two!
— Ernie Banks
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For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
— Dave Barry
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A ball had passed between my body and the right arm which supported him, cutting through the sleeve and passing…
— Clara Barton
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Some people are born to lift heavy weights, some are born to juggle golden balls.
— Max Beerbohm
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Go on daddy-daughter dates and father-and-sons' outings with your children. As a family, go on campouts and picnics, to ball…
— Ezra Taft Benson
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If people don't want to come out to the ball park, nobody's gonna stop 'em.
— Yogi Berra
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Leadership is diving for a loose ball, getting the crowd involved, getting other players involved. It's being able to take…
— Larry Bird
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It doesn't matter who scores the points, it's who can get the ball to the scorer.
— Larry Bird
See all 1,827 Balls Quotes »