"I wish I could play little league now.……" — Mitch Hedberg
"I wish I could play little league now. I'd be way better than before."
—
Mitch Hedberg
★
★
★
★
★
0.0 avg (0 ratings)
163 Quotes by Mitch Hedberg
Mitch Hedberg has 163 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
-
Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having.
-
Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you…
-
I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get…
-
I like rice. Rice is great if you're hungry and want 2000 of something picketing, but I don't know how…
-
Foosball screwed up my perception of soccer. I though you had to kick the ball and then spin around and…
-
If you drink O'Douls, you don't drink; but if you drink 20 O'Douls in a half hour, then you're a…
-
I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass…
-
What am I drinking? NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.
-
I wanna hang a map of the world in my house. Then I'm gonna put pins into all the locations…
-
I love my fed-ex guy cause he's a drug dealer and he don't even know it...and he's always on time.
-
Hell, yeah! Meeting adjourned!
-
Well, I was lost but now I live here! I have severely improved my predicament!
See all 163 quotes by Mitch Hedberg »
More Better Quotes
This quote is filed under Better Quotes,
one of 25,349 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
-
I keep my friends as misers do their treasure, because, of all the things granted us by wisdom, none is…
— Pietro Aretino
-
Why, I'd like nothing better than to achieve some bold adventure, worthy of our trip.
— Aristophanes
-
If one way be better than another, that you may be sure is nature's way.
— Aristotle
-
It is clearly better that property should be private, but the use of it common; and the special business of…
— Aristotle
-
Making mistakes is a lot better than not doing anything.
— Billie Joe Armstrong
-
I think when you're 10 years old, it's too much to see something with the threat of death in every…
— J. J. Abrams
-
Ever since the Crusades, when Christians from western Europe were fighting holy wars against Muslims in the near east, western…
— Karen Armstrong
-
The power of one, if fearless and focused, is formidable, but the power of many working together is better.
— Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo
-
Suppose that we are wise enough to learn and know - and yet not wise enough to control our learning…
— Isaac Asimov
-
I can scarcely manage to scribble a tolerable English letter. I know that I am not a scholar, but meantime…
— John James Audubon
-
God judged it better to bring good out of evil than to suffer no evil to exist.
— Saint Augustine
-
Anything in any way beautiful derives its beauty from itself and asks nothing beyond itself. Praise is no part of…
— Marcus Aurelius
See all 25,349 Better Quotes »