"I hope life isn't a big joke, because…" — Jack Handey

"I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it."

— Jack Handey

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397 Quotes by Jack Handey

Jack Handey has 397 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

If any man says he hates war more than I do, he better have a knife, that's all I have…
I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.'
People think it would be fun to be a bird because you could fly. But they forget the negative side,…
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Caveman the best. We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived…
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater, because then people would sing about me…
Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's…
What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that…
Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around…
MEMORIES OF MY FAMILY MEETINGS still are a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all get into the…
I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy…

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More Big Quotes

This quote is filed under Big Quotes, one of 12,915 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

I can honestly say - and it's a big surprise to me - that I have never had a dream… — Neil Armstrong
If you are careful with people, they will offer you part of themselves. That is the big secret. — Eve Arnold
I had some big ups and downs when I was in my 20s and the one thing I learned was,… — Darren Aronofsky
These big-package releases. There should be a cute name for them. — Julian Assange
I just wish the world was twice as big and half of it was still unexplored. — David Attenborough
Apart from anything else, I am designed by evolution, like we all are: if we see a little thing like… — David Attenborough
I have a big following among the biogeeks of this world. Nobody ever puts them in books. — Margaret Atwood
For better or worse, zoos are how most people come to know big or exotic animals. Few will ever see… — Diane Ackerman
I've always been a big fan of science fiction and of the worlds of the spiritual and the mystic. — Dan Aykroyd
In some places women have all the rights they deserve and in others there are big restrictions - in some… — Michelle Bachelet
Small business is the backbone of our economy. I'm for big business, too. But small business is where the jobs… — Michele Bachmann
I want my candidacy for the presidency of the United States to stand for a moment when we the people,… — Michele Bachmann

See all 12,915 Big Quotes »