Guy Quotes

8437 quotes by 4261 authors

Good guys are most likely to finish last, but also most likely to finish first. — Adam Grant
In a chemistry class there was a guy sitting in front of me doing what looked like a jigsaw puzzle or some really weird kind… — Jon Postel
It got more exciting with each war. I mean the planes were going faster than hell when I was flying a Mustang, but by the… — Robin Olds
A guy will promise you the world and give you nothin', and that's the blues. — Otis Rush
It's often said that the Democrats fight 'for the little guy.' That's true: liberals fight to make sure the little guy stays little! Think about… — Angela McGlowan
If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flipper, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flipper, wouldn't you? You'd be… — Jack Handey
I think a good movie would be about a guy who's a brain scientist, but he gets hit on the head and it damages the… — Jack Handey
I wouldn't be surprised if someday some fisherman caught a big shark and cut it open, and there inside was a whole person. Then they… — Jack Handey
It makes me mad when I go to all the trouble of having Martha cook up about a hundred drumsticks, the the guy at the… — Jack Handey
I think a good way to get into a movie is to show up where they're making the movie, then stick a big cactus plant… — Jack Handey
There's a guy who won't be in contention. There's another one I don't have to worry about. — Jack Nicklaus
I believe in destiny...what's going to be is going to be. If I'm going to win, I'm going to win...I don't give a damn what… — Sam Snead
No guy in the history of America has ordered a Smirnoff Ice at a bar without hating himself a little. — Unknown Author
Guy goes into a bar with a duck under his arm. Bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig?" Guy says, "This is a duck." Bartender… — Rodney Dangerfield
Jose was one of those guys on a surfboard who can stay longer on the wave than anyone else. — Alex Ferguson
The guy's (Shane Spencer) ridiculous. No one hits home runs like that. I'm telling you, man, it's ridiculous. — Derek Jeter
In my opinion, I've had the greatest job in the world. I got a chance to be the shortstop for the New York Yankees, and… — Derek Jeter
The puppet on the right shares my beliefs, the puppet on the left is more to my liking. Hey...there's one guy holding up both! — Bill Hicks
What strikes me as funny about Elvis is that all the impersonators choose to do the Vegas Elvis, not the young, cool guy... — Bill Hicks
Rogue states never turn out to be quite the pariahs they are deemed. They are only able to cause, or at least threaten to cause,… — Margaret Thatcher

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4,261 authors contributed a total of 8,437 Guy Quotes, led by these top contributors: