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First Quotes by Nikhil Saluja
- The first thing I do when I receive wedding invitations in the mail is read them for typos.
- If we bang on the first date chances are our relationship is lasting about as long as my erection.
- One time, I drunkenly threw up into a mailbox and yelled First class delivery and now I'm a dad.
- First come first serve is irrelevant when you show up with an AK-47.
- I don't believe in love at first sight but I do believe in judging at first sight.
- Time spent after a test... 5% Re-checking answers 5% Erasing answers 90% waiting for someone else to hand their test in first
- The first to apologize is the bravest, the first to forgive is the strongest, the first to forget is the happiest.
- Experiment: testing the '9 lives' theory. First attempt: cat not moving after throwing it from the roof. Conclusion: theory is false
- Don't waste your time giving someone a second chance, when there is someone better out there waiting for their first.
- If you text me first you better have something to talk about. Don't hit me up expecting me to start the conversation. It was your…
- If you don't text first, we won't talk - my only rule with my imaginary girlfriend
- I will never hate on you, unless you disrespect me, or hate on me first. That's just the kind of person I am. I give…
- They say that you make a first impression after the first 7 seconds. To avoid this, I always show up 7 seconds late.
- Twitter: where no one is afraid to say the first thing that pops into their head.
- I have learned there is little difference in husbands; you might as well keep the first.
- Parents spend the first parts of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us sit down and shut…
- HUSBAND, PERFECT, is, in a man's second marriage, her first mate
- MARRIAGE, Is a book in which the first chapter is written in poetry and the rest of the book is prose;
- PRAISE, Something which, if directed to your wife, will lighten your marriage -- even if it frightens her at first.
- STERILISE: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.
- Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'
- Politicians are like bananas when they first come in they're green, then they turn yellow, and finally they're rotten!
- Earlier I used to feel like a guy trapped inside a woman's body. Especially during the first nine months.
- I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of…
- What was the first tweet of twitter? Probably about assholes coming soon.
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More First Quotes
- No punishment has ever possessed enough power of deterrence to prevent the commission of crimes. On the contrary, whatever the punishment, once… — Hannah Arendt
- The spirit of Ubuntu, that once led Haiti to emerge as the first independent black nation in 1804, helped Venezuela, Colombia and… — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- The first time Haiti had free and fair democratic elections was 1990, when I was elected. — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- I am lucky, I'm the first to admit that. — J. J. Abrams
- Courage is the first of human qualities because it is the quality which guarantees the others. — Aristotle
- For though we love both the truth and our friends, piety requires us to honor the truth first. — Aristotle
- He who is to be a good ruler must have first been ruled. — Aristotle
- In making a speech one must study three points: first, the means of producing persuasion; second, the language; third the proper arrangement… — Aristotle
- Retired is being tired twice, I've thought, first tired of working, then tired of not. — Richard Armour
- The first time that you escape from home or the small town that you live in - there's a reason a small… — Billie Joe Armstrong
- For some young people, their first experience ever hearing punk rock music was playing the Green Bay Packers on 'Madden'. — Billie Joe Armstrong
- Ironically, the first thing that appealed to me about Islam was its pluralism. The fact that the Koran praises all the great… — Karen Armstrong