All Terry Pratchett Quotes
- In Genua, someone set out to make dreams come true. Remember some of your dreams? Come True
- What're quantum mechanics?" "I don't know. People who repair quantums, I suppose. Know People
- The trouble is you can shut your eyes but you can’t shut your mind. Eye
- I’m not superstitious. I’m a witch. Witches aren’t superstitious. We are what people are superstitious of. Aren
- Everywhere's been where it is ever since it was first put there. It's called geography. Been
- Veil, you see, if I vas to say something portentous like "zer dark eyes of zer mind" back home in Uberwald, zer would be a… Alas
- And gears," said Anathema. "My bike didn't have gears. I'm sure my bike didn't have gears." Crowley leaned over to the angel. "Oh lord, heal… Anathema
- Fresh wounds," said Angua. "But one of them did shoot one of the other in the leg by accident." "I think you'd better put in… Accident
- The important thing about having lots of things to remember is that you’ve got to go somewhere afterwards where you can remember them, you see?… Afterwards
- The world is a globe — the farther you sail, the closer to home you are. Closer
- Life is a trick, and you get one chance to learn it. Chance
- The dwarfs can turn lead into gold... It reached the pointy ears of the dwarfs. -Can we? -Damned if I know. I can't. -Yeah, but… Ah
- [Science fiction is] out in the mainstream now. You can tell by the way mainstream literary authors pillage SF while denying they're writing it! Authors
- They were small, brightly coloured, happy little creatures who secreted some of the nastiest toxins in the world, which is why the job of looking… Bases
- Natural selection saw to it that professional heroes who at a crucial moment tended to ask themselves questions like 'What is my purpose in life?'… Ask
- Igor?' said Moist. 'You have an Igor?' Oh, yes,' said Hubert. 'That's how I get this wonderful light. They know the secret of storing lightning… Agreed
- Your average witch is not, by nature, a social animal as far as other witches are concerned. There's a conflict of dominant personalities. There's a… Animal
- He helped the Librarian up. There was a red glow in the ape's eyes. It had tried to steal his books. This was probably the… Any
- We've strayed into a zone with a high magical index,' he said. 'Don't ask me how. Once upon a time a really powerful magic field… Ask
- Contrary to popular belief and hope, people don't usually come running when they hear a scream. That's not how humans work. Humans look at other… Backfiring
- Peace?' said Vetinari. 'Ah, yes, defined as period of time to allow for preparation for the next war. Ah
- On the Disc, the Gods aren't so much worshipped, as they are blamed. Blamed
- It was octarine, the colour of magic. It was alive and glowing and vibrant and it was the undisputed pigment of the imagination, because wherever… Alive
- Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided… Achieve
- It was all very well going on about pure logic and how the universe was ruled by logic and the harmony of numbers, but the… All