The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day — Scott Adams Delusion Copy Share Image
In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. — Scott Adams Best way Copy Share Image
The best way to compile inaccurate information that no one wants is to make it up. — Scott Adams Best way Copy Share Image
“For example, if every time you eat popcorn, one hour later you fart so hard that it inflates your socks, you can… — Scott Adams Time Copy Share Image
“Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Large corporations welcome innovation and individualism in the same way the dinosaurs welcomed large meteors. — Scott Adams Corporations Copy Share Image
“The things that you think about the most will irrationally rise in importance in your mind.” — Scott Adams Psychology Copy Share Image
“Failure always brings something valuable with it. I don’t let it leave until I extract that value.” — Scott Adams Failure Copy Share Image
As network administrator I can take down the network with one keystroke. It's just like being a doctor but without getting gooky… — Scott Adams Administrators Copy Share Image
Women are treated differently by society for exactly the same reason that children and the mentally handicapped are treated differently. — Scott Adams Children Copy Share Image
“Humans are hardwired to reciprocate favors. If you want someone’s cooperation in the future, do something for that person today.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens… — Scott Adams Amendment Copy Share Image
Before 'Dilbert,' I tried to become a computer programmer. In the early days of computing, I bought this big, heavy, portable computer… — Scott Adams Computers Copy Share Image
“There is more information in one thimble of reality than can be understood by a galaxy of human brains. It is beyond… — Scott Adams Human brain Copy Share Image
In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“The worst thing your brain could do is reinterpret your reality into a whole new movie with each new bit of information.… — Scott Adams Path of least resistance Copy Share Image
The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day. This is why people… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle… — Scott Adams Dating Copy Share Image
“Practicality rules our perceptions. To survive, our tiny brains need to tame the blizzard of delusion generator information that threatens to overwhelm… — Scott Adams Delusion Copy Share Image
“I’ve explained to a number of people my observations about how exercise, diet, and sleep influence mood. The usual reaction is a… — Scott Adams Bad luck Copy Share Image
If you work in the city long enough, it begins to deal with you on a personal level. Streets reveal their moods.… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
To the engineer, all matter in the universe can be placed into one of two categories: (1) things that need to be… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Reality outside the quantum world of particles and waves might be fixed and objective, at least according to most scientists. But how… — Scott Adams First impression Copy Share Image
You might argue that my example is bad because Einstein is dead. But according to physicist Erwin Schrodinger, Einstein is neither dead… — Scott Adams Alive Copy Share Image
“I also find it helpful to remind myself that every human is a mess on the inside. It’s easy to assume the… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“By the early-afternoon hours, if your brain is normal, it's running strictly on inertia and reflex. All you can do during those… — Scott Adams Creative writing Copy Share Image
Simple molecules combine to make powerful chemicals. Simple cells combine to make powerful life-forms. Simple electronics combine to make powerful computers. Logically,… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
If you give an ant infinite time, it can move a mountain all by itself — Scott Adams Ants Copy Share Image
I never knew what an engineer did for a living when I was a kid. I still don't. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Every other question has an answer to why. Only probability is inexplicable.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
On the fourth day of telecommuting, I realized that clothes are totally unnecessary. — Scott Adams Clothes Copy Share Image
