P.G. Wodehouse Quotes

280 quotes in 3604 categories

• There was the man who seemed to be attempting to decieve his ball and lull it into a false sense of security by looking away…
• It was a morning when all nature shouted Fore! The breeze, as it blew gently up from the valley, seemed to bring a message of…
• Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone…
• He was either a man of about a hundred and fifty who was rather young for his years, or a man of about a hundred…
• Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
• The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact.
• Cats, as a class, have never completely got over the snootiness caused by the fact that in ancient Egypt they were worshipped as gods. This…
• Mr Howard Saxby, literary agent, was knitting a sock. He knitted a good deal, he would tell you if you asked him, to keep himself…
• So always look for the silver lining And try to find the sunny side of life.
• Statisticians estimate that crime among good golfers is lower than in any class of the community except possibly bishops.
• I believe there are two ways of writing novels. One is mine, making a sort of musical comedy without music and ignoring real life altogether;…
• Chumps always make the best husbands. All the unhappy marriages come from the husbands having brains.
• His eyes were rolling in their sockets, and his face had taken on the colour and expression of a devout tomato. I could see he…
• Routine is the death to heroism.
• If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
• ...smoking is just a habit. 'Tolstoy', she said, mentioning someone I hadn't met, 'says that just as much pleasure can be got from twirling the…
• His whole aspect was that of a man who has unexpectedly been struck by lightning.
• Work, the what's-its-name of the thingummy and the thing-um-a-bob of the what d'you-call-it.
• The storm is over, there is sunlight in my heart. I have a glass of wine and sit thinking of what has passed.
• Back horses or go down to Throgmorton Street and try to take it away from the Rothschilds, and I will applaud you as a shrewd…

Browse P.G. Wodehouse Quotes by Category