All Mark Twain Quotes
- You take the lies out of him, and he'll shrink to the size of your hat; you take the malice out of him, and he'll… Disappear
- I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight. Except
- The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close. Anything Without
- The church is always trying to get other people to reform, it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way… Always Trying
- Irrevence is another person's disrespect to your god; there isn't any word that tells what your disrespect to his god is. Any
- Concentration of power in a political machine is bad; and an Established Church is only a political machine; it was invented for that; it is… Bad
- I purpose publishing these Letters here in the world before I return to you. Two editions. One, unedited, for Bible readers and their children; the… Bible
- Blasphemy? No, it is not blashphemy. If God is as vast as that, he is above blasphemy; if he is as little as that, He… Beneath
- It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have been better for us-oh infinitely… Adam
- Surely the ass who invented the first religion ought to be the first ass damned Ass
- We have to keep our God placated with prayer, and even then we are never sure of him-how much higher and finer is the Indian's… All
- I have never seen what to me seemed an atom of proof that there is a future life. And yet-I am inclined to expect one. Atom
- Man is a marvelous curiosity...he thinks he is the Creator's pet...he even believes the Creator loves him; has passion for him; sits up nights to… Admire
- Man is kind enough when he is not excited by religion Excited
- If you would beseech a blessing upon yourself, beware! lest without intent you invoke a curse upon a neighbor at the same time. Beseech
- Our Congresses consist of Christians. In their private life they are true to every obligation of honor; yet in every session they violate them all,… All
- In America-as elsewhere-free speech is confined to the dead. America
- Men are more compassionate/(nobler)/magnanimous/generous than God; for men forgive their dead, but God does not. Compassionate
- Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the company! Advantage
- Well, no doubt it's a blessed thing to have an imagination that can always make you satisfied, no matter how you are fixed. Always Make