Lenny Bruce

Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is…

— Lenny Bruce

I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.

— Lenny Bruce

Never trust a preacher with more than two suits.

— Lenny Bruce

I would be with a bunch of Kennedy fans watching the debate, and their comment would be, 'He's really slaughtering Nixon.' Then…

— Lenny Bruce

If you're from New York and you're Catholic, you're still Jewish. If you're from Butte Montana and you're Jewish, you're still goyisch.…

— Lenny Bruce

I think it's about time we gave up religion and got back to God.

— Lenny Bruce

Alright, let's admit it, we Jews killed Christ - but it was only for three days.

— Lenny Bruce

“People are leaving the church and going back to God.”

— Lenny Bruce

Dig: I'm Jewish. Count Basie's Jewish. Ray Charles is Jewish. Eddie Cantor's goyish. B'nai B'rith is goyish; Hadassah, Jewish. If you live…

— Lenny Bruce

I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm…

— Lenny Bruce

“If you can't say "Fuck" you can't say, "Fuck the government.”

— Lenny Bruce

“Take away the right to say ‘fuck’ and you take away the right to say ‘fuck the government.”

— Lenny Bruce

The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.

— Lenny Bruce

If I get busted in New York, the freest city in the world, that will be the end of my career.

— Lenny Bruce

“Liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.”

— Lenny Bruce

Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.

— Lenny Bruce

I was a Jew talking about Goyim religion. If I had just stuck to Moses, everything would have been cool. But, copping…

— Lenny Bruce

The reason I'm in this business, I assume all performers are -- it's Look at me, Ma! It's acceptance, you know --…

— Lenny Bruce

I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write songs like, "What I'm…

— Lenny Bruce

You know there's no crooked politicians. There's never a lie because there is never any truth.

— Lenny Bruce

Let me tell you the truth: The truth is what is. And what should be is a fantasy a terrible, terrible lie…

— Lenny Bruce

I'll die young, but it's like kissing God.

— Lenny Bruce

There are no dirty words, only dirty minds.

— Lenny Bruce

I want to perform an unnatural act.

— Lenny Bruce

Every group needs a comedian. A comic who is politically incorrect at the Berkeley campus might slay them at a Klan rally.

— Lenny Bruce