Joe Dirt

Queer? Is this queer? These queer? What's up? What's up?

— Joe Dirt

I got the poo on me!

— Joe Dirt

If I told you you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

— Joe Dirt

Ya gotta keep on, keepin' on.

— Joe Dirt

You can't have no in your heart. No is not an option brother.

— Joe Dirt

Things get the darkest before dawn.

— Joe Dirt

My mom used to say that to me if she caught me doin stuff, like one time I was jerkin my gerkin…

— Joe Dirt

You wanna fight? Why don't you stick your head up my butt and fight for air.

— Joe Dirt

Well well, lookey here. Corn off the cob.

— Joe Dirt

You gotta keep on keepin on.

— Joe Dirt

You are gonna make some guy so happy. I just hope whoever it is, he deserves a girl like you.

— Joe Dirt

You like to see homos naked?

— Joe Dirt

Life's a garden dig it

— Joe Dirt

No man, you gotta keep going. What am I gonna do, quit? That's not an option. You gotta keep on keepin on.…

— Joe Dirt

Your nuts are frozen to the porch. Oh that sucks.

— Joe Dirt

That hug was completely asexual, he kinda snuck it up on me.

— Joe Dirt

Like them spinnin tires, do ya?

— Joe Dirt

No sir man, I don't like that crap. I'm a rocker, dude, through and through. Here's my favorite bands. AC/DC, Van Halen…

— Joe Dirt

You. Show me them boobies.

— Joe Dirt

Watch the guns baby, that's how I get the gals.

— Joe Dirt

Things are gonna happen for me. I'm Joe Dirt!

— Joe Dirt

Alls I gotta do is keep bein a good person, no matter what. Good things will come my way.

— Joe Dirt

It's like the cartoons, I'm seein all tweet tweet.

— Joe Dirt

They're large and in charge, and they're lookin for chickies.

— Joe Dirt

Everything's gonna happen for me, just as long as I don't have no in my heart.

— Joe Dirt