Trevor Noah is a great, relevant young comic, and Comedy Central is smart to stand by him. — Jim Norton Comedy Copy Share Image
I have cowlicks, so my hair has always been a source of torture for me. — Jim Norton Always Copy Share Image
You know, a comedian's comedian is just that - it's a guy who's original and funny and can make comics laugh. — Jim Norton Comedian Copy Share Image
I'd like to get my own TV show on, whether it's a talk show or a comedy, that I write. — Jim Norton Comedy Copy Share Image
That's an interesting accent you got there. Are you from stroke-victim? — Jim Norton Accents Copy Share Image
I love everything about Boston. The women are phenomenal, they're all dirty. It's just a really great place to do comedy. — Jim Norton Great Copy Share Image
You really are a badass, edgy guy who tells it like it is...about couscous. — Jim Norton Badass Copy Share Image
Everyone has a reason why their particular sacred cow is the sacred cow to be honored. — Jim Norton Cow Copy Share Image
Wherever I go, there is definitely my audience. I would say in some places there's more of them than others, but it's… — Jim Norton Audience Copy Share Image
My job is to express who I am and what I hate about the country and what I love about it and… — Jim Norton Country Copy Share Image
I love doing the radio, and it's different every day. But stand-up is just you and the immediate reaction of the audience.… — Jim Norton Day Copy Share Image
All major cities are the same. People have the same sensibilities and they get afraid of the same subjects, groaning at the… — Jim Norton Afraid Copy Share Image
If the show is going really well and the comedian is still annoyed with the audience, chances are he's a Boston comic.… — Jim Norton Audience Copy Share Image
If someone doesn't like a comedian that's fine; a lot of people probably don't like my standup, and that's fine. But I… — Jim Norton Comedian Copy Share Image
It's not a hard job, radio or standup, there are hard parts of it, sure. There are guys who do ten hours… — Jim Norton Construction Copy Share Image
Communicate and just be open with each other. Have an unpleasant talk once in a while so it does not turn into… — Jim Norton Communicate Copy Share Image
It's nice to have funny friends. I like watching my friends perform. — Jim Norton Friends Copy Share Image
Two men spit in their hands, help each other out, then laugh about it later. Just to be silly. — Jim Norton Being silly Copy Share Image
While There may be power in forgiveness, there is even more power in lobbing a Molotov cocktail through someone's dining room window. — Jim Norton Cocktails Copy Share Image
Anyone who can't tell the difference between a joke and hate speech is just stupid. — Jim Norton Comedy Copy Share Image
Here's the rule of thumb: When the entire family looks like the unibomber, they're against gay marriage. — Jim Norton Family Copy Share Image
Comics who consider themselves 'mavericks' or think the crowd doesn't get them are normally lousy comics. — Jim Norton Comics Copy Share Image
Every comic says things that are going to offend someone, so we all have to defend each other with this stuff. — Jim Norton Comic Copy Share Image
The media is a very necessary thing in our country to keep people honest. — Jim Norton Country Copy Share Image
You 50 year old one-breasted bag of meat. Just hang it up and be grateful some of your friends are still living. — Jim Norton Bags Copy Share Image
For the record, I hate skiing... and if you get killed doing it, GOOD. — Jim Norton Funny Copy Share Image
If I leave the mike in the stand, my hands absolutely move more. I'm not sure if it's a conscious thing. — Jim Norton Hands Copy Share Image
I'm not really great at writing things down unless for a roast or a particular event. — Jim Norton Great Copy Share Image
I never expect anything. The more good things that happen the better, but I never expect anything. — Jim Norton Better Copy Share Image
Realize that doing comedy is only going to make your depression worse. — Jim Norton Comedy Copy Share Image
I think people like to label everything. I just think it's comfortable. — Jim Norton Comfortable Copy Share Image
Americans have always been inconsistent and kind of fake with outrage, but we've just slipped totally upside-down. — Jim Norton Always Copy Share Image
I once had a therapist fall asleep on me. That really wrecks your self-esteem. — Jim Norton Esteem Copy Share Image
What's the name of the birth defect you have, trampled by a horse during the 2nd trimester? — Jim Norton Birth Copy Share Image
