Cases Quote by Andy Borowitz

John Edwards comes from working folk, just like me. John Edwards worked hard and excelled to get his education, just like me.

— Harvey Gantt

How about this John Edwards thing? Imagine that, a personal injury attorney who turns out to be a sleaze ball. Who could have seen…

— Jay Leno

There is nothing just or fair about what happened to Jordan Edwards. And his story is yet another in a long line of tragedies…

— Kristen Soltis Anderson

President Obama has appointed a new head of the Secret Service. The new Secret Service director was so excited that he jumped over the…

— Conan O'Brien

“This man who in the pursuit of his aims could be so utterly ruthless—who would let nothing stand in his way; who, in the…

— Robert A. Caro

Democratic candidate John Kerry on Tuesday chose fellow Senator John Edwards to be his running mate. Asked about Edwards' lack of foreign policy experience,…

— Dennis Miller

During last night's debate, John Kerry and John Edwards were so friendly to each other some political experts think that they may end up…

— Conan O'Brien

Barack Obama, who might be mercifully closing the Clinton parenthesis in presidential history, is refreshingly cerebral amid this recrudescence of the paranoid style in…

— George Will

For Obama to save himself, he should be thinking about the example of an unlikely Republican predecessor: Richard Nixon.

— John Podhoretz

“When the people elected a president like this one, who ran a campaign like the one he ran, it was hard to imagine what…

— Orson Scott Card

“The Obama administration, from the perspective of people like me, a government employee, is one of the worst. The people of this administration came…

— Tuvia Tenenbom

Barack Obama took office in the middle of a massive financial crisis. He was handed a bunch of messes all around the world and…

— Jon Lovett