Witty Quotes · Page 46

Clever, witty and absorbing, Amortality is a much-needed anatomy of our profound malaise about ageing. Its charms will never fade.

— David Baddiel

I think about Aaron Rodgers, he's like Chris Evans before he got the HGH injection in Captain America. But before he was…

— Michael Bennet

My best tweets are when someone take them personnel & instantly unfollow me.

— Nikhil Saluja

#3 pencils and quadrille pads.

— Seymour Cray

When getting divorced remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river.

— Nikhil Saluja

As soon as she gets her divorce one of us is going to marry her. We don't know which. She is about…

— Richard H. Davis

I only read biographies, metaphysics and psychology. I can dream up my own fiction.

— Mae West

I'm a misplaced American, but don't know where I was misplaced

— Ruby Wax

Cellphones are like a dog's nipples. You don't have to shout into them!

— Nikhil Saluja

Wit is the appearance, the external flash, of fantasy. Hence its divinity and the similarity to the wit of mysticism.

— Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel

LOVE, The triumph of imagination over intelligence;

— Nikhil Saluja

Love may be blind but marriage is an eye opener.

— Anonymous

Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for…

— Anonymous

Just be yourself is great advice to maybe 12% of people.

— Nikhil Saluja

...first to dream and then to do -- isn't that the way to make a dream come true?

— Meindert Dejong

I started pooping 10 times a day because it's where I come up with my best tweets.

— Nikhil Saluja

Light Lunch? Whiskey and a Cigar

— Nikhil Saluja

The only possible conclusion the social sciences can draw is: some do, some don't.

— Ernest Rutherford

It was a typically British birth... I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward... I came…

— Bob Hope

Do not cry for those who hurt you, this way you're making them successful, smile and be the winner.

— Nikhil Saluja

I basically try not to waste any lines in any of my songs, and I think the witty phrases and funny lyrics…

— Mike Stud

“Some wounds don’t scar over. They just learn to dress better.”

— Janus Lucky

“State your point. If the opposite party doesn't agree, state it harder- with a punch.”

— Jennifer Bernard

Girls become so ugly when they know they're pretty

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE, A ceremony favoured in England -- it's the only way to beat their cold winters and lack of central heating;

— Nikhil Saluja