“Sometime bad self-esteem is just good common sense" Cloris Leachman, Spanglish” — Kristen Wasyliszyn Copy Share Image
You know what's cuter than your baby? Sleeping in till 11am on weekends. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, The continuous process of getting used to things you never expected; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Pro-gas-ti-na-tion¦ Waiting to fill up your tank while hoping the gas prices will actually go down. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Etc: The word that makes people think you are smarter than you really are. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
It is terribly amusing how many different climates of feelings one can go through in one day. — Anne Morrow Lindbergh Copy Share Image
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. — Milton Berle Copy Share Image
No man should travel until he has learned the language of the country he visits. Otherwise he voluntarily makes himself a great… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I wanted to play with death, like a child with a new toy, I wanted to push all the buttons and see… — Holly Hood Copy Share Image
As soon as she gets her divorce one of us is going to marry her. We don't know which. She is about… — Richard H. Davis Copy Share Image
My wife and I both made a list of 5 people we could sleep with...she read hers out and there were no… — Michael McIntyre Copy Share Image
Observe it, the vulgar often laugh, but never smile, whereas well-bred people often smile, and seldom or never laugh. A witty thing… — Lord Chesterfield Copy Share Image
What I need is a woman who is something, anything: either very beautiful or very kind or in the last resort very… — Alfred de Musset Copy Share Image
The sea is common for all... Some take pearls, some take fishes, and some come out just with wet legs..!! The world… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
13 year olds having sex and getting drunk? When I was 13 I was injecting heroin and had committed my 4th murder, Pussies. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm going to show you the real New York - witty, smart, and international - like any metropolis. Tell me this: where… — Oriana Fallaci Copy Share Image
I have been lately introduced to the famous Thomas Paine, and like him very well. He is vain beyond all belief, but… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A funny person is funny only for so long, but a wit can sit down and go on being spellbinding forever. One… — Diana Vreeland Copy Share Image
He grinned. “Busted. I’m a monster. Jev is my deceptively harmless — and shockingly handsome — alter ego.” “And I’m on top… — Becca Fitzpatrick Copy Share Image
“Forgive me. It was stupid of me to think you might need company, when clearly all you required was that decanter.” “It… — Madeline Hunter Copy Share Image
...whatever other qualities Jews may posses, likable or the reverse, no one who knows them well can deny that they are personally… — Ernest Jones Copy Share Image
You can choose, you can go one of two ways. You can be the person I probably admire more and say 'well… — J. K. Rowling Copy Share Image
By the end of the session, I am no one at all. Haymitch started drinking somewhere around witty, and a nasty edge… — Suzanne Collins Copy Share Image
