We went to lunch and were talking about procrastination and the waitress overheard us and she said, 'I have a problem with… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
And we certainly don't have full conversations on cellphones. You know? Usually the reception is so bad, but it's only bad on… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I appreciate your giving my book -- and in no small way, me -- a chance. To thank you, I really wanted… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
It's so much better for me to do a talk show. You still have that energy of the audience, and the audience… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in my mind I'm just like “shut up,… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
Standup is more me talking the entire time. There's definitely an exchange of energy because that room, that audience, is giving back. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I do have ADD and in real life, I'm all over the place and can hardly focus. If we were talking for,… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
My dream guests are really not so much celebrities. They're people who are actually interesting and they're doing something interesting with their… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
There are “well-known secrets” out there and there are people who are “so happy they could die.” Sometimes people are so sad… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
You listen to any monologue on late-night TV or just in general, to people talking, and there's always a joke at someone's… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I wanted to have money; I wanted to be special; I wanted people to like me; I wanted to be famous. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I think what saved me is me being honest. I think I somewhow had the courage to do something and say something that I… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I think there's too much mult-tasking going on. I think people need to quiet down and focus and be still more. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
We can sit and worry about what's going to happen to us two weeks from now. I'd rather focus on the amazing things happening… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
It's our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting. Are they fun when they happen? No. But they… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I had done a sitcom and a movie and hosted the Emmys, and all of a sudden, I lost everything. As someone put it… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy for yourself and yourself. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
Save a life this Thanksgiving, and join me in starting a new tradition by adopting a turkey instead of eating one through Farm Sanctuary's… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
Answers to Frequently Asked Questions: Yes. Yes. No. One time in high school. Three times in my twenties. Rocks no salt. Yes. Four. Never.… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
Actually this is really funny - one time she accidentally forgot to leave a note and I had no idea she had even moved.… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
Gratitude is looking on the brighter side of the life, even if it means hurting your eyes. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
