You can't write a children's book that takes more than five or six minutes to read, because it will drive the parents batty. It has to be compact. Nobody thinks about the parents when they write these stupid books. I… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I was very surprised how many people were earnestly reminiscing about the '80s. It's such a stupid thing to do, like, to be honestly invested in nostalgia. It never even occurred to me to do that. — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
Many, many people can write books. I just happen to be one of them. — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“I do not go to church. I don’t go to Christian church or Jew church or any other church. I don’t go to church… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
My process is surprisingly straightforward. I find myself with little to do over a stretch of time and I say, "I should write children's… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“If I have any faith at all, I guess that's it. Faith in the small love that keeps our family together.” — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
Whatever expectations I had for myself, none of them have come to pass. I grew up thinking I was going to be an actor,… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
You have to lead, in the case of a game show, a contestant through the architecture of the show. So there's a lot of… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I can be a snarky Asshole, or I can be sort of mentally impaired. It's very hard for me to just be normal human… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
By the end of the time I'm writing a book, I'm tearing my hair out and I want to go do stand-up. And then… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
Kids love to be silly, they love to laugh, so I think it was natural for my kids to like the sort of books… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I am a poker player, but I am not a good poker player. My favorite game is seven card stud, but I'll play hi/lo,… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
When you're writing something, and you're putting yourself out there, or you're performing and someone comes in and savages that, then of course it… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
