Eat only when you are hungry. Drink only when you're thirsty. Sleep only when you're tired. Screw only when you're horny. — Al Neuharth Copy Share Image
Can we screw the 'sorry' part and let me hit you back instead?" Vishous to Butch — J.R. Ward Copy Share Image
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb? The plum tree in the garden! — Brad Warner Copy Share Image
If you're not playing a big enough game, you'll screw up the game you're playing just to give yourself something to do. — Peter McWilliams Copy Share Image
I'm not funny in person. I mean I'm really not. I'm one of those people who always screw up anecdotes. — Bill Bryson Copy Share Image
Parenting is the easiest job to get - you just have to screw up once and it's yours. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
You've got to gamble every once in a while in a round of golf. I'm not afraid to screw up. — Fuzzy Zoeller Copy Share Image
Now it's just sharp elbows, and instead of having a caucus where you sit down and say, 'What are you doing for… — Alan K. Simpson Copy Share Image
Zuniga Hides the Evidence ... Like the craven coward he is, Markos Zuniga, rising young star of the Democrats, has now removed… — Charles Foster Johnson Copy Share Image
Certain people just go home and veg out, certain people go travel the world and certain people are like, "Screw this, I'm… — Shane West Copy Share Image
At the end of the day, all people want to do is hear a great singer sing a great song. They don't… — Vince Gill Copy Share Image
I believe that the subconscious always knows what is best. It is our conditional, vastly overrated rational mind which screws everything up. — Robyn Davidson Copy Share Image
If you have an idea that's going to make a big difference to people's lives, and other people are not doing it,… — Richard Branson Copy Share Image
Back then I said to myself 'screw football.' Actually I just took part in this camp as there was nothing better for… — Ed O'Neill Copy Share Image
I was always big. I was kind of around this size, like, since I went into high school. I played rugby and… — Seth Rogen Copy Share Image
There are no normal people, there are just different kinds of weird, all of it is human and all humanity is better… — Dan Harmon Copy Share Image
You should definitely have a travel agent. Why go through all the hassle of dealing with airlines, hotels, and rental-car agencies yourself,… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Actors tend to get in their own way, a lot. A lot of times you will do things that will screw up… — George Clooney Copy Share Image
New Rule: Since our new national position on science is, "Screw it, we prefer witchcraft," let's not just retire the Space Shuttle… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The dimmed outlines of phenomenal things all merge into one another unless we put on the focusing-glass of theory, and screw it… — James Clerk Maxwell Copy Share Image
When you screw up, you got to pay the price. Shoot up a supermarket, you go to jail. Ride a motorcycle without… — Christopher Titus Copy Share Image
The world is very good at encouraging you to go along with the status quo and at basking in your successes. But… — Viola Davis Copy Share Image
When human men hold an object that makes a powerful noise, or has moving parts, or spins around fast, or has a… — Craig Stone Copy Share Image
Our politicians screw up all the time, as we see. But with so many things, we're no longer the world leader in… — Peter Sagal Copy Share Image
