I'm a little hoarse tonight. I've been living in Chicago for the past two months, and you know how it is, yelling for help on the way home every night. Things are so tough in Chicago that at Easter time,… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you'll end up in the police station. — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
“I can't understand why a person will take a year or two to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
“(Faces are all important. Without faces it would be impossible to identify our friends. If we had to recognize people by their bodies, we… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. Fred Allen — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
I'm a little hoarse tonight. I've been living in Chicago for the past two months, and you know how it is, yelling for help… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
He writes so well he makes me feel like putting my quill back in my goose. — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year. — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
When a radio comedian's program is finally finished it slinks down Memory Lane into the limbo of yesteryear's happy hours. All that the comedian… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
