I am so pathetic with machines in real life, it's not a joke. I'd rather walk, or even run, than take the… — Bipasha Basu Copy Share Image
People come up to me on the street and make some little joke - like they'll say, 'Excuse me, sir, what time… — Teller Copy Share Image
I'm not against divorce, but I do believe it's really not a joke to find a life partner. In fact, better be… — Heart Evangelista Copy Share Image
I could write a joke song really easily, but I think something that might be true for my generation is that there's… — Ezra Furman Copy Share Image
I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage,… — Kathy Griffin Copy Share Image
“We humans are still a joke in this universe; we are not real, not yet! Universe can annihilate us in seconds! If… — Mehmet Murat ildan Copy Share Image
“The average adult hates being treated like a child, unless it suits them.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
You're over there in the corner either thinking about the dead dog or whatever, you're bringing up your personal life and you… — Marcia Gay Harden Copy Share Image
I joke that one of the rare times Egyptians identify as African is when the national soccer squad is playing in the… — Mona Eltahawy Copy Share Image
There is a big old joke around the 'Loose Women' team that I never shave my legs. — Stacey Solomon Copy Share Image
I have a comic character - my sister said that I'm the victim of every joke I tell. — Maria Bamford Copy Share Image
The biggest difference between the two is how intimate the theatre is. Film is so different because, when youre on set, even… — Renee Rapp Copy Share Image
I don't go off and sit down and try to write material, because then it's contrived and forced. I just live my… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
I suppose if we couldnt laugh at things that dont make sense, we couldnt react to a lot of life. — Calvin & Hobbes Copy Share Image
There has been nothing more impactful on my life and meaningful to me than the introduction of Christ. That, hands down, blows… — Steve Harvey Copy Share Image
“Saying that you do not remember something or someone is a less embarrassing or hurtful way of saying that you do not… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Here's the thing, with comedy - and I learned this from Will Ferrell - you can't be ashamed. If you're doing comedy,… — John C. Reilly Copy Share Image
I didn't know if I could be funny on stage or write a joke. But I saw that there are no rules.… — Kumail Nanjiani Copy Share Image
“You have to be a sexologist: when I wish your fuckin' advice, I'll let you know.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
