Sometimes my brother and I - we're twins, and sometimes we joke that we're like a two-headed monster. We can be hard… — Aaron Dessner Copy Share Image
Loretta Lynn, Tammy Wynette, Dolly Parton and I were the first female headliners, where we would book our own opening acts. Before… — Barbara Mandrell Copy Share Image
I believe it is tough to be funny and tougher to make people laugh. And it needs to be been done effortlessly.… — Vivek Oberoi Copy Share Image
You've noticed that same joke told by two different people, once works, and the other time doesn't, simply because how the person… — Abbas Kiarostami Copy Share Image
“What was this past summer to you?” Cinderella said, stalking back and forth like an angry mountain cat. “A joke? A way… — K.M. Shea Copy Share Image
It's easy to play fun forms, surfaces, and languages against each other. Teenagers do this every day, producing winning memes from random… — Torbjørn Rødland Copy Share Image
Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. I may joke about knowing fear, but the fact is, the first… — Harlan Coben Copy Share Image
The brain process that results in a joke materializing where no joke was before remains a mystery. I'm not aware of any… — Dick Cavett Copy Share Image
“I’m relieved to see that even brilliant physicists make mistakes.” Kohler looked over. “What do you mean?” “Whoever wrote that note made… — Dan Brown Copy Share Image
A guy goes to a local novelty shop and finds a pair of x-ray glasses. He checks them out, and isnt fully… — Theophilus Copy Share Image
What people who don't write don't understand is that they think you make up the line consciously — but you don't. It… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
There's a joke about the balloon boy who has a balloon mum and a balloon dad and he goes to a balloon… — Gabrielle Williams Copy Share Image
“I'm going out with Colin Osgood today, and he's meeting me here. If you start making kissy noises, I will strip you… — Sarah Addison Allen Copy Share Image
“Is that how tall you are without those ridiculous shoes?' he said derisively. I think I was born bigger than that.' 'I… — Josephine Angelini Copy Share Image
My mum had four kids on her own, so if I had one kid with one nanny and not a full-time job,… — Abbey Clancy Copy Share Image
Someone said to me at a party once, 'Oh, yeah, you're a comedian? Then how come you're not funny now?' And I… — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
I definitely have friends who gave me a tag for a joke I already had. Like, 'Here's another line.' A tag is,… — Chris Cubas Copy Share Image
I don't like it when I see a racist comedian go up and say, 'What are we gonna do about all these… — Ricky Gervais Copy Share Image
I was never a joke teller. I don't even like jokes, for the most part. I don't like to hear them, and… — Ed O'Neill Copy Share Image
Historically, Heathrow has been something of a joke, outweighed by its excellent connections. We have to aspire to having an airport at… — Philip Hammond Copy Share Image
I have "come back" [to music scene] so many times, people are just like, Is this another one?... It's kind of like… — Britney Spears Copy Share Image
“Dude, estoy aqui por loco, no por pendejo," which was the punch line to the funniest Spanish joke I knew. Okay, the… — Cory Doctorow Copy Share Image
We are constantly being showered by little blood clots, but if you have PFO and a little blood clot gets to your… — Terry Dubrow Copy Share Image
I'd been writing sketches since high school, but 'Friends of the People' really taught me about structure - how to wait out… — Jermaine Fowler Copy Share Image
Thank you people that are laughing with your hand away from your mouth. That joke is clearly not for everyone, but I… — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
“The sun is a joke. Oranges can’t titillate their jaded palates. Nothing can ever be violent enough to make taut their slack… — Nathanael West Copy Share Image
It would be a joke to compare Gerd Muller to other strikers. What he achieved, the number of games and the goals… — Miroslav Klose Copy Share Image
Comedy is a very personal thing, as you would know if you've ever told the same joke to two people and had… — Andrew Denton Copy Share Image
I nearly got hit by a car while I was trying to write a stupid joke but a female sheep stood in… — Joe Lycett Copy Share Image
The idea that Donald Trump committed an abuse of power by bringing politics into a foreign relationship is a joke. They all… — Steve Hilton Copy Share Image
The very phrase 'Oscar night' used to accelerate my pulse. For one thing - dating myself - it meant Bob Hope. He… — Dick Cavett Copy Share Image
Gravy Train!!!! started out as a joke where we'd crash parties and be really obnoxious, and then somehow we got somewhat famous,… — Hunx Copy Share Image
“Saying that you do not remember something or someone is a less embarrassing or hurtful way of saying that you do not… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Gweneth [sic] Paltrow is a joke. Her life is like taking bullets for a soldier. What a joke! My 2 sons serving… — Cindy McCain Copy Share Image
It is rare for a joke to emerge fully formed and it is worth grafting away until it is absolutely right. Though… — Richard Herring Copy Share Image
I mean, I've had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort… — Todd Barry Copy Share Image
The fact that 'Mom' is not joke, joke, joke - and is investing in these characters and their lives, things that really… — Allison Janney Copy Share Image
A lot of times people come up to me saying 'oh my god you can see,' and they think they're the first… — Nat Wolff Copy Share Image
My dad is a really funny guy, and we would make jokes about my leukemia. When my friends would come over, we… — Vanessa Bayer Copy Share Image
“Nakamura considered this. "I hesitate to agree, but that was probably a good idea." "A compliment! My goodness, let me mark the… — Kevin Sylvester Copy Share Image
![“I have "come back" [to music scene] so many times, people are just like, Is this another one?... It's kind of like a joke to me now.” quote by Britney Spears](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/019/britney-spears-1356_joke_i-have-come-back-to-music-scene-so-many_160910.jpg)
![“Gweneth [sic] Paltrow is a joke. Her life is like taking bullets for a soldier. What a joke! My 2 sons serving in the military should talk to her,” quote by Cindy McCain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/673/cindy-mccain-16878_bullets_gweneth-sic-paltrow-is-a-joke-her-life-i_1600913.jpg)
