Communist until you get rich, feminist until you get married, atheist until the airplane starts falling — Juanda Brahma Metta Copy Share Image
“I can see into your heart. You have good intentions. You can’t go wrong when you start with good intentions.” — Linda Armstrong Copy Share Image
The Democrats planned to fiddle while Rome burned. The Republicans were going to burn Rome, then fiddle. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
This looks like one of those unwelcome social summonses which call upon a man either to be bored or to lie. — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
It is far better to know our own weaknesses and failures than to point out those of others. — Jawaharlal Nehru Copy Share Image
They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert. — Victor Borge Copy Share Image
Asking politicians to give up a source of money is like asking Dracula to forsake blood. — Cal Thomas Copy Share Image
“With sunglasses, a hat, and half a pack of Band-Aids, Roger could pass as a human.” — Nadia Higgins Copy Share Image
“I once asked him why he smoked the world's most expensive cigarette, and he told me it was because he was a… — K.H. Koehler Copy Share Image
The only thing that prevented a father's love from faltering was the fact that there was in his possession a photograph of… — P. G. Wodehouse Copy Share Image
I'm tired of hearing about innocent victims. It's fiction, If you live on this planet you're guilty, period, f*** you, next case,… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“The point of tantric sex was supposedly to harness sexual energy to awaken higher consciousness. It was just like yoga, but way… — Jackson Radcliffe Copy Share Image
“More often than not, an inspirational or motivational speaker is someone who makes money from telling us that we can do all… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
After a truly good meal, an outstanding cigar is still the most satisfying after-dinner activity that doesn't involve two human beings. — Brad Shaw Copy Share Image
Brothers are a blessing for one thing. There is no possibility of any young lady getting unreasonably conceited if she be endowed… — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
“yes, i have dated Salvador Dali guy when i was a high school girl. he was a great lover. but i had… — Hiroko Sakai Copy Share Image
“After reading some of my stories, I once had a friend say to me, "I'd love to spend five minutes in your… — Mark W Boyer Copy Share Image
“Asher taps his fingers on his lips and I catch Amy licking her own as she eyes his mouth. "What exactly are… — Jessica Sorensen Copy Share Image
For those who believe in the quote, Laughter is the best medicine and are looking for a divorce quote on the lighter… — Pamela Anderson Copy Share Image
“He done his level best. Was he a mining on the flat.. He done it with a zest.. Was he a leading… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I saw a great Newfoundland dog the other day sitting in front of a mirror at the entrance to a shop in… — Jerome K. Jerome Copy Share Image
“The fireworks continued to burn and spread all over the school that afternoon. Though they caused plenty of disruption, the other teachers… — J.K. Rowling Copy Share Image
“Flirt with the old ladies and you’ll be fine,” I muttered, shoving my stuff into the cubby. He hung his green hoodie… — Katherine McIntyre Copy Share Image
“It commenced raining one day and did not stop for two months. We went through ever different kind of rain they is,… — Winston Groom Copy Share Image
My mother could make anybody feel guilty - she used to get letters of apology from people she didn't even know. — Joan Rivers Copy Share Image
“We all have different languages; but we all really mean the same thing.” — C.S. Lewis Copy Share Image
The unexpected has happened so continually in my life that it has ceased to deserve the name. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley. — Winston Churchill Copy Share Image
As expected, you get his machine. Someday, even the "call of nature" will be answered by a machine. — Tom Robbins Copy Share Image
Mobile phones are the only subject on which men boast about who's got the smallest. — Neil Kinnock Copy Share Image
“Ish #19 "If your diet soda has zero calories, zero sugar and zero fat, what the hell are you drinking?” — Regina Griffin Copy Share Image
“You spit in this?" "Yup." Chris shrugged. "As long as you're honest.” — R.L. Mathewson Copy Share Image
“Who ever felt canary yellow and light blue are a suitable color should be tarred and feathered.” — Rae Z. Ryans Copy Share Image
You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are. — Adolphus Busch Copy Share Image
I'm not a robot; I have a personality and I have emotions. I have a humorous side to me and an angry… — Jeff Gordon Copy Share Image
“Behind every humorist who delights in knifing hypocrites is a major self-critic.” — Wendy Aron Copy Share Image
“We seldom look up to the person; we usually look up to their persona.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“If we take the president of GM, they'll make us pay to give him back." (said by a kidnapper)” — Owen Laukkanen Copy Share Image
