If I paid ten dollars for a cigar, first I'd make love to it, then I'd smoke it. — George Burns Copy Share Image
“The average adult has had sex innumerable times more than they have formed an opinion of their own.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“I do believe in shooting the messenger. You know why? Because it sends a message.” — L.J. Smith Copy Share Image
“"If you want that kind of thing, call Nick. His advice is shit, but he really likes to give it.” — Kelley Armstrong Copy Share Image
Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming. — J. P. McEvoy Copy Share Image
I have never had sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky. I've never had an affair with her. — William J. Clinton Copy Share Image
Invite them all in. Nip out the back door. Phone the police and tell them your house is being burgled. — Mike Harding Copy Share Image
“A life is similar to a book. Some chapters are boring,a few emotional, a handful memorable,others saddening,one or two thoughtful and many… — Elizabeth Adeniyi Copy Share Image
“Never judge a person until you've walked a mile in their busted up shoes and haven't had any money for medication for… — Lori Lesko Copy Share Image
Thou shall not kill. Thou shall not commit adultery. Don't eat pork. I'm sorry, what was that last one?? Don't eat pork.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I love doing humorous roles and I write my characters that way. But I haven't received many offers from others to do… — Sreenivasan Copy Share Image
“Do you follow the wrestling? Most people think it's illegal, but you can watch it there. Ruby and Python are on display… — Samuel R. Delany Copy Share Image
“My father had bought him a shirt that said “Sure you can date my daughter. In a completely unrelated topic, have you… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“You know, I can’t wait for her to gets married because hell is made of fire and she said it would be… — J.T. Cheyanne Copy Share Image
“Panty Melter: an exceedingly rare species of man blessed with so many desirable attributes he effortlessly gains access into a girl's panties.” — Tracy Brogan Copy Share Image
“How's the blood-stream, my dear, invaluable little woman? How's the blood-stream?"... "It's quite comfortable, sir...I think, sir, thank you."... "Aha!"..."a comfortable stream,… — Mervyn Peake Copy Share Image
Something about the possession of a book - an object that can contain infinite fables, words of wisdom, chronicles of times gone… — Alberto Manguel Copy Share Image
Throughout my career, I've always portrayed characters that were humorous, but also weren't afraid to speak their minds, especially when it came… — Betty White Copy Share Image
“Yes, I know this narrative is crowded with beautiful women - Mrs. Pearson, Mrs. Maycott, Mrs. Lavien, Mrs. Bingham. We might form… — David Liss Copy Share Image
“Kalina remained paralyzed in her seat. “Oh, crap. Aaron was a vampire.” She straightened up. Remain calm, Kalina. Breathe. “You're not going… — Kailin Gow Copy Share Image
“He shouted into the phone, “That is fuckin’ awesome. I mean fuckin’ awesome. I fuckin’ mean fucking awesome. You are one Big… — Michael Lewis Copy Share Image
“One day in 1948 or 1949, the Brentwood County Mart, a shopping complex in an upscale neighborhood of Los Angeles, California, was… — Alex Ross Copy Share Image
“He told us that it had been a fine day to-day, and we told him that it had been a fine day… — Jerome K. Jerome Copy Share Image
Sex has been around for a long time. You may not believe this, but it was around before I was. — George Burns Copy Share Image
Happy Mother's Day to the greatest mom in the world besides Michelle Obama. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Renee: “Trout, get your mind out of the gutter.” Trout: “Can’t help it—it’s attached to my body.” — John C. Stipa Copy Share Image
Because of its vitality, the computing field is always in desperate need of new cliches: Banality soothes our nerves. — Alan Perlis Copy Share Image
I used to like humorous people in the past, but these days, I like serious people more. — Park Shin-hye Copy Share Image
A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future. — Denis Waitley Copy Share Image
“A word to the wise an't nesisary its the stupid ones who need the edvise.” — Eliga H. Gould Copy Share Image
A flatterer never seems absurd: The flatter'd always takes his word. — Benjamin Franklin Copy Share Image
You've always been a great mom because of your patience, sense of humor, and fondness for daytime drinking. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A fine horse or a beautiful woman, I cannot look at them unmoved, even now when seventy winters have chilled my blood. — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
This has always bothered me. If Change is the only constant how can we have absolutes? — Stanley Victor Paskavich Copy Share Image
Subversive, ethical, ecological, political, humorous ... this is how I see my duty as a designer. — Philippe Starck Copy Share Image
