When I die, they'll bury the blues with me. But the blues will never die. — John Lee Hooker Copy Share Image
“I think she fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.” — Lorna Seilstad Copy Share Image
Trust is the most important part of a realtionship. You must be 100% sure that she Won't tell your Wife. — Zhat Copy Share Image
If Monday was a girl; it would be that fat girl who likes horses & tells the teacher when you cheat. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Let's just be friends is a nice way of saying Let's ignore each other and never talk..! — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
Tending to ourselves, we tend the world. Tending the world, we tend ourselves. — Jack Kornfield Copy Share Image
U think I'm jealous of u??? Well yes I am coz if I would b a boy I could have never gotta… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The last person they expected to connect with a screenplay was the comedic, blonde actress with the funny voice. — Joey Lauren Adams Copy Share Image
Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready… — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
I love my 'Survivor's Remorse' cast. They are so funny and crazy, like a big dysfunctional family. It's so much fun, and… — Teyonah Parris Copy Share Image
I like that people try to be funny even though there not because it's so much easier to be an ass hole… — Merle Anthony Rowland Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you. I was sitting on your couch, relating my succession of ideas on subconscious influence. I asked… — Bauvard Copy Share Image
I gave my heart to the Lord, and I remember the incident vividly. The Lord spoke to me. I know that sounds… — Jimmy Swaggart Copy Share Image
My bank lets me send a text message and it'll text back with my balance. It's a cool feature but I didn't… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There is no flattery so adroit or effectual as that of implicit assent. — William Hazlitt Copy Share Image
Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
One time I was forced to go to the doctors because of a sports accident. Herpes. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
You know your gay when your the only person to like your own stuff on fb. :D — Delbert Copy Share Image
GOLDEN WORDS ARE NOT REPETED AGAIN AND AGAIN...BECAUSE THE GOLD VALUE IS VERY HIGH...HAHAHAHA — Sudhakar Copy Share Image
I'll be ready in 5 minutes is exactly the same as I'll be home in 5 minutes. — Ewshy Copy Share Image
All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.. :P — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
That sad moment when you can feel you and your best friend slowly drifting apart. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's so cute when the baby thinks it's going to steal attention from us. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That sign of old age, extolling the past at the expense of the present. — Sydney Smith Copy Share Image
Dear future husband, I promise to be faithful but I'll always cheat on you with something... My lipstickð. — Igbayilola Dosunmu Copy Share Image
It doesn't matter how many times the audience has heard it before. If it's funny, it's funny. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
“The only difference between me and a madman is that he has the certification” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Little-known fact about cheerleaders: They keep schedules that would make grown marines cry.” — Jennifer Lynn Barnes Copy Share Image
In the main, there are two sorts of books: those that no one reads and those that no one ought to read. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
