If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it. — WCFields Copy Share Image
Happy Halloween to someone I trust not to leave me for dead during a zombie apocalypse. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's funny, I never considered that people are going to see me on the show and maybe stop me on the subway. — Lena Dunham Copy Share Image
Exceed due measure, and the most delightful things become the least delightful. — Epictetus Copy Share Image
When people say When I was little… and I'm just awkwardly sitting there like, I still do that — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It (LSD) opened my eyes. We only use on-tenth of our brain. Just think of what we could accomplish if we could… — Paul McCartney Copy Share Image
Another goal that I have is to learn how to play the ukulele - should be fun - and to stop taking… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
Ladies and Gentlemen, we're about to begin boarding. If we could ask for your cooperation, please stay seated until you row has… — Brian Regan Copy Share Image
Ive been fighting to be who I am all my life. Whats the point of being who I am, if I cant… — SD Lennox Copy Share Image
I like Taylor Swift a lot. She has really fun, catchy songs. It's so funny: I always say any guy that's gonna… — Rozonda Thomas Copy Share Image
It is a blessed thing that in every age someone has had the individuality enough and courage enough to stand by his… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'd love to become like Bill Murray, who was so funny on 'Saturday Night Live' and has gone on to do some… — Will Ferrell Copy Share Image
“Although they probably know that some children were used and some children are used as miners, most adults are ignorant of the… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Who says that tears dont fall from my eyes,now there is a firewall present between me and you...:( — DD Copy Share Image
Don’t see the mind for more than it is, but don’t misread it for all that it can be. — Jim Rohn Copy Share Image
“Six minutes isn’t sex,” I hear him saying as my eyes crash shut. “Six minutes is a boiled egg.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's true I don't know that much about Ligue 1, but Ligue 1 knows who I am. — Zlatan Ibrahimovic Copy Share Image
People don't realize that I'm really funny and I'm an excellent bridge player. — Sheryl Crow Copy Share Image
If you send a damned fool to St. Louis, and you don't tell them he's a damned fool, they'll never find out. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you are in love-that's a good thing-that's about the best thing that can happen to anyone. — John Steinbeck Copy Share Image
SOCIALISM: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The very relationship with the other is the relationship with the future. — Emmanuel Levinas Copy Share Image
Well arent u fuckers in the real world happy .. ITS ALMOST 5 O CLOCK ... — Joey Bones Copy Share Image
It's funny when their are some people talks behind you but they don't know the truth. — Mitch Alapan Copy Share Image
I never thought of doing anything but comics, except maybe being a pilot. — Ernie Colon Copy Share Image
That Ugly moment When a guy stretches so far , you can see his chubbs and rolls — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hate it when I am singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong. — Cuts And Scars Copy Share Image
If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner. — Tallulah Bankhead Copy Share Image
Invest in places that make sense so you can afford to live in places that don’t make sense. — Jason Hartman Copy Share Image
I love 'AP Bio' - I think it's so funny - it's just not the show I want to do. — Adam F. Goldberg Copy Share Image
