Facebook status Quotes by Anonymous · Page 9

Sunglasses allow an individual to stare at people without them knowing. It is Facebook in real life.

— Anonymous

I hate it when you sit down in shorts and suddenly your thighs look 9867484949 times fatter.

— Anonymous

Never knew liking somebody status on facebook ment you had to know them.

— Anonymous

Dear food commercials, Nobody eats in slow motion with their eyes closed. Sincerely, normal people...

— Anonymous

I've been the rebound, the challenge, the fall back, and the girlfriend. I've been the mistake and the correction. One day someone…

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when you wait for a text but then you realize you're the one who didn't reply.

— Anonymous

Studies show that sex in the morning is more effective than caffeine. At least that's what I'm going with.

— Anonymous

SO TUREEE :D

— Anonymous

Men hate women because we always know where things are.

— Anonymous

Hey Verification Code, I have no idea what the f*ck that says but I swear I'm human.

— Anonymous

I dont need a perfect one. I just need someone who can make me feel that Im the only one...:-)

— Anonymous

Good Morning everyone have a nice 10-11-12 day.

— Anonymous

Time may stop, days maybe over, months may go, years may pass, world may end, but ders 1thng dat wil surely remain!…

— Anonymous

Do not ever underestimate my ability to find shit out.

— Anonymous

You'll never see me on Hoarders because I can't afford that much shit.

— Anonymous

I have no yesterdays, time took them away, tomorrow may not be mine, but I have today. So wish you a very…

— Anonymous

Seeing quotes and thinking, oh thank god I'm not the only one!

— Anonymous

I want a relationship. A real, pure, loving, honest relationship. I'm not lonely or desperate, I'm just ready.

— Anonymous

My boyfriend isn't allowed to watch E.T, why the fuck does he wanna watch his ex girlfriend find her way home.

— Anonymous

At least my job description doesn't involve repairing the economy or being the new head football coach at Penn State.

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when nobody likes your Facebook status .

— Anonymous

The past can't be forgotten, changed, edited,or erased...It can only be accepted...

— Anonymous

Actions speak louder than Facebook posts. It's time to go do some of those things you are typing about.

— Anonymous

I'm sure the people who work at Starbucks think, 'I'm so damn tired of these kids coming in here and taking pictures…

— Anonymous

If you want to cry use a tissue, not your Facebook status.

— Anonymous

When you only have $3.00 and you must choose between gas or Mc Donald's.

— Anonymous

To all those who said I couldn't make jokes about blind people...watch me.

— Anonymous

Welcome to Facebook. The Weather today: An 80% chance of game requests, a 10% chance of pokes, and a 100% certainty of drama

— Anonymous

The moment when you serve cereal in a bowl, open the fridge, and realize there is no milk. I mean It doesnt…

— Anonymous

If sex isn't better than love, then why they have all these hoes walking around ?

— Anonymous

This is how my week goes. Mooooooooooooonday, Tuuuuuuuesday, Weeeeeeednesday, Thuuuuuuursday, FridaySaturdaySunday.

— Anonymous

Making faces to a stranger's baby when their parents aren't looking...

— Anonymous

That terrible feeling when you have no internet connection.

— Anonymous

Pumpkin Spice Lattes are to college girls; what mini-shooters of whiskey are to alcoholics.

— Anonymous

I hate those cheap pencils with erasers that mess up the paper more than the mistake you want to erase.

— Anonymous

I'm in a love/hate relationship with my bed. I love crawling into it at night, I hate leaving it in the morning.

— Anonymous

What if Men In Black was really real, but we just cant remember because weve all been neutralized?

— Anonymous

Don't worry about things that don't worry about you.

— Anonymous

Players play, haters hate, losers lose, and winners win.

— Anonymous

Phone in 80's : Something futuristic Phone in 90's : Only for emergency Phone in 20's : Important life Phone in future : baby toys

— Anonymous