No one can tell me what is a good cigar--for me. I am the only judge... There are no standards--no real standards.… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The humorist who invented trial by jury played a colossal practical joke upon the world, but since we have the system we… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
You try to tell me anything about the newspaper business! Sir, I have been through it from Alpha to Omaha, and I… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Well - Patriotism has its laws. And it also is a perfectly definite one, there are not vaguenesses about it. It commands… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It{California} is the land where the fabled Aladdin's Lamp lies buried-and she {San Francisco} is the new Aladdin who shall seize it… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Thou shalt not commit adultry is a command which makes no distinction between the following persons. They are all required to obey… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
You need not expect to get your book right the first time. Go to work and revamp or rewrite it. God only… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Begin with the determination to succeed and the work is half done already. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
