America's a family. We all yell at each other. It all works out. — Louis C. K America Copy Share Image
I know I'm getting old because there will be times when I'm not even doing anything and I'll think, 'I need to… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
If you have something to say, here's what you do: You write it down on a piece of paper, you go out… — Louis C. K Home Copy Share Image
It's hard to know where your thoughts come from, especially when you have a thirst for material because you need it professionally. — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usually a comedy and writing… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
To me the goal of comedy is to just laugh, which is a really high hearted thing, visceral connection and reaction. — Louis C. K Comedy Copy Share Image
I'd love to have a shitty job. I couldn't hold any down. Standup was the only thing I could stick with. I'm… — Louis C. K Idiot Copy Share Image
I've had soccer moms come up and tell me they can relate when I say that I want to throw my baby… — Louis C. K Baby Copy Share Image
Most Americans have so much crap, that you could lose most of it and still have way more stuff than the average… — Louis C. K Americans Copy Share Image
The Jackass movies are honestly some of the best movies I've ever seen. I laugh so hard at them. Those guys are… — Louis C. K Artist Copy Share Image
If you're older, you're smarter. I just believe that. If you're in an argument with someone older than you, you should listen… — Louis C. K Argument Copy Share Image
You could drive a rental car until you don't want it. Just get out of it while it's moving and just walk… — Louis C. K Broadway Copy Share Image
The part that's difficult is being single, at 41, after 10 years of marriage and two kids. That's like having a bunch… — Louis C. K Being single Copy Share Image
Bill Gates has 90 billion dollars ... If I had 90 billion dollars, I wouldn't have it for long because I would… — Louis C. K Baseball Copy Share Image
here's a huge amount of work that goes into placating a network in regular television. It's literally 70% or 80% of your… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
Some things I think are very conservative, or very liberal. I think when someone falls into one category for everything, I'm very… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
Dating is horrible, it's awful. I don't get it. It's like you're standing there: 'Hi. Do you want to have sex and… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
I didn't make any kind of grades in high school. My mother was a single mom, putting my three sisters through college,… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
“A woman saying yes to a date with a man is literally insane and ill-advised, and the whole species' existence counts on… — Louis C. K Feminism Copy Share Image
[about being a father] I don't really remember what it was like before. Whatever I had going on, it was bullshit. It… — Louis C. K Being a dad Copy Share Image
I just always loved comedy and I really wanted to be good at it. And it was heartbreaking, 'cause I started and… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
There's people that say “It's not fair You have all that stuff.” I wasn't born with it. It was a horrible process… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
The earliest stand-up comedy I was aware of was Bill Cosby. I watched Saturday Night Live as soon as I was aware… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
It’s been a very old thing for people to gather together and laugh at stuff. The first comedian in America really was… — Louis C. K Abraham Copy Share Image
I can feel how an audience is reacting when I'm on a stage, but when you are on stage, your perception is… — Louis C. K Audience Copy Share Image
Being popular with an audience is a very rickety ladder to be on. — Louis C. K Audience Copy Share Image
Performing comedy, you develop a rhythm of ideas and laughs. I live for it. — Louis C. K Comedy Copy Share Image
![“[about being a father] I don't really remember what it was like before. Whatever I had going on, it was bullshit. It wasn't important. It's kind of a nice thing about being a dad. My identity is really about them now, and what I can do for them, so it sort of takes the pressure off of your own…” quote by Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/366/louis-c-k-1150_being-a-dad_about-being-a-father-i-don-t-really-reme_2678938.jpg)
