Good manners are the technique of expressing considerations for the feelings of others. — Alice Miller Compassion Copy Share Image
The true opposite of depression is not gaiety or absence of pain, but vitality: the freedom to experience spontaneous feelings. — Alice Miller Absence Copy Share Image
It is possible to resolve childhood repression safely and without confusion - something that has always been disputed by the most respected… — Alice Miller Childhood Copy Share Image
The more we idealize the past and refuse to acknowledge our childhood sufferings, the more we pass them on unconsciously to the… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
Only the mourning for what one has missed at the crucial time can lead to real healing. — Alice Miller Grief Copy Share Image
If a mother respects both herself and her child from his very first day onward, she will never need to teach him… — Alice Miller Children Copy Share Image
Wherever I look, I see signs of the commandment to honor one's parents and nowhere of a commandment that calls for the… — Alice Miller Child Copy Share Image
What is addiction, really? It is a sign, a signal, a symptom of distress. It is a language that tells us about… — Alice Miller Addiction Copy Share Image
The truth about childhood, as many of us have had to endure it, is inconceivable, scandalous, painful. Not uncommonly, it is monstrous.… — Alice Miller Childhood Copy Share Image
“The answer is that we can never do the right thing as long as we are out to please someone else. We… — Alice Miller Child Copy Share Image
Experience has taught us that we have only one enduring weapon in our struggle against mental illness: the emotional discovery and emotional… — Alice Miller Acceptance Copy Share Image
“Unless the heir casts off his “inheritance” by becoming fully conscious of his true past, and thus of his true nature, loneliness… — Alice Miller Isolation Copy Share Image
The commandment to refrain from placing blame on our parents, deeply imprinted in us by our upbringing, skillfully performs the function of… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
Those children who are beaten will in turn give beatings, those who are intimidated will be intimidating, those who are humiliated will… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
Every child has a legitimate narcissistic need to be noticed, understood, taken seriously, and respected by his mother. In the first weeks… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
“Once we have learned to live with our feelings and not to fight against them, we see in the manifestations of our… — Alice Miller Danger Copy Share Image
“Today, as adults, we know that our efforts were exploited, that this was not love in the true sense of the word.… — Alice Miller Childhood trauma Copy Share Image
Almost everywhere we find . . . the use of various coercive measures, to rid ourselves as quickly as possible of the… — Alice Miller Adults Copy Share Image
The abused child goes on living within those who have survived such torture, a torture that ended with total repression. They live… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
It was not the beautiful or pleasant feelings that gave me new insight, but the ones against which I fought most strongly:… — Alice Miller Beautiful Copy Share Image
“Relationships based on masklike communication of this kind cannot change. They remain what they have always been: instances of mis-communication. A genuine… — Alice Miller Communication Copy Share Image
“Most people do exactly the opposite. Without realizing that the past is constantly determining their present actions, they avoid learning anything about… — Alice Miller Children Copy Share Image
“As I see it, the point is that people who cannot estimate and respect themselves, who cannot allow themselves the free expression… — Alice Miller Creativity Copy Share Image
It is unlikely that someone could proclaim "truths" that are counter to physical laws for very long (for example, that it is… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
Society chooses to disregard the mistreatment of children, judging it to be altogether normal because it is so commonplace. — Alice Miller Children Copy Share Image
Parents are indeed capable of routinely torturing their children without anyone interceding. — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
That probably greatest of narcissistic wounds -- not to have been loved just as one truly was -- cannot heal without the… — Alice Miller Grief Copy Share Image
If we do not work on all three levels -- body, feeling, mind -- the symptoms of our distress will keep returning,… — Alice Miller Body Copy Share Image
Genuine feelings cannot be produced, nor can they be eradicated. We can only repress them, delude ourselves, and deceive our bodies. The… — Alice Miller Body Copy Share Image
Anyone who has ever been a mother or father and is at all honest knows from experience how difficult it can be… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
The only possible recourse a baby has when his screams are ignored is to repress his distress, which is tantamount to mutilating… — Alice Miller Ability Copy Share Image
“Compulsive substance addiction can have disastrous effects because it blocks off the path to genuine emotions and feelings. The drug can supply… — Alice Miller Addiction Copy Share Image
Learning is a result of listening, which in turn leads to even better listening and attentiveness to the other person. In other… — Alice Miller Children Copy Share Image
The art of not experiencing feelings. A child can experience her feelings only when there is somebody there who accepts her fully,… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
I have never known a patient to portray his parents more negatively than he actually experienced them in childhood but always more… — Alice Miller Childhood Copy Share Image
Where there had been only fearful emptiness or equally frightening grandiose fantasies, an unexpected wealth of vitality is now discovered. This is… — Alice Miller Creation Copy Share Image
We don't yet know, above all, what the world might be like if children were to grow up without being subjected to… — Alice Miller Child Copy Share Image
“Experience has taught me that my own body is the source of all the vital information that has enabled me to achieve… — Alice Miller Confidence Copy Share Image
It is very difficult for people to believe the simple fact that every persecutor was once a victim. Yet it should be… — Alice Miller Abuse Copy Share Image
The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected as the person he really is at any given time, and… — Alice Miller Copy Share Image
