My girlfriend told me I'm awful in bed. I don't know how she can tell in 30 seconds. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Who are you? Why am I here? I want answers now or I want them eventually! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When I have bad dreams I wake up pissed at the person in real life for like 5 minutes. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sometimes you just have to sit down and ask your parents if they sold your soul. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't mind if others don't like me. After all,I'm not a Facebook status. — Abhishek Tiwari Copy Share Image
When you're doing something you aren't supposed to, every small noise scares the shit out of you. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A good friend will like my status. A great friend will like my status, share it, and invite me to breakfast. — Justin Mccloskey Copy Share Image
I have learn that in relationship you should be faithful ..if you can't be faithful then be careful..!! — Strawberry Copy Share Image
Million dollar idea for a sci-fic movie: A world just like ours but with one key difference. When your phone dies, YOU… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If the professor doesn't show up to class in the first 15 minutes, you get to leave. Somebody make that a law, please. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can write and post the thoughts and stop thinking if your friend will like it or not the important is you… — Mitch Alapan Copy Share Image
Dear radio stations, You do know there are more than 4 songs in the world, right? Sincerely, annoyed listeners. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Define Nanosecond : The time required for a guy to finish a conversation the moment he finds out the girl he's talking… — Naeem Copy Share Image
Ever looked back at your ex and asked yourself was I drunk the entire relationship? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You think youre pretty smart until you have to figure out how to turn on someone elses shower. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you push your brother down the stairs, he will become your step brother. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Some hoes only meet the parents because they gotta walk pass the living room. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“The best sign of a really nice and working relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.” — Hongki Ader Copy Share Image
People usually say Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Personally, I find it's in big boobs. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you fuck over people who've been nothing but good to you, you create demons for yourself. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Etc: The word that makes people think you are smarter than you really are. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I wish facebook would notify me when people delete me, that way I can Like it. — Nate Copy Share Image
It's always awesome when my blinker matches the beat of the song on the radio. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Smoking weed is legal in 6 states. Having sex with a horse is legal in 23. Good going America. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Facts are meaningless - you could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
We cant and we dont READ MINDS. So SPEAK UP if you want us to know whats on your mind. — Collins Hasty Copy Share Image
He'll never be better than he is on the first date. Unless he's rich and hasn't told you yet. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm well aware when i've to use suck me or fuck me. Yea I'm classy like that! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Who else has dropped the phone on their face while laying in bed reading Facebook? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
