"Top 10 Things to do at the Mall……" — Nate

"Top 10 Things to do at the Mall 10. At the bottom of an escalator, scream MY SHOELACES! AAAGH! 9. At the stylist, ask to have the hair on your back permed. 8. Ask a saleswoman whether a particular shade of panties matches the color of your beard. 7. Sneak up on saleswomen at the perfume counter and spray them with your own bottle of Eau de Swanke. 6. Collect stacks of paint brochures and hand them out as religious tracts. 5. At the pet store, ask if they have bulk discounts on gerbils, and whether theres much meat on them. 4. Hand a stack of pants back to the changing room attendant and scornfully announce that none of them are leak proof. 3. Ask appliance personnel if they have any TVs that play only in Spanish. 2. Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big. 1. Show people your drivers license and demand to know whether theyve seen this man."

— Nate

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314 Quotes by Nate

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More Announce Quotes

This quote is filed under Announce Quotes, one of 180 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

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The myth of unlimited production brings war in its train as inevitably as clouds announce a storm. — Albert Camus
Just give a drum roll, announce my name & I come out & sing. I have a contract that says… — Tony Bennett
old pear tree starlings announce harvest time — Unknown Author
Speech is often barren; but silence also does not necessarily brood over a full nest. Your still fowl, blinking at… — George Eliot
A look which reveals inward stress adds more beauty to the face, no matter how much tragedy and pain it… — Khalil Gibran
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