"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my……" — Tommy Cooper

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• You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said… — Tommy Cooper
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• Did I hurt you in the parking lot?" "No, m'lady. I fell, so I could put a tracker on your… — Ilona Andrews
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• If you can't park it don't drive it and if you can't drive it don't buy it! — Unknown Author
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