Beard Quote by Tom Armstrong

Maybe Santa Claus is real. Here's the problem: reality.

— David Remnick

Here's what we know about Santa. He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. He knows if you've been bad or…

— David Letterman

Santa blows all these shipping companies away. He delivers more than 2 billion packages in just 24 hours. He does it by sleigh. He…

— Craig Ferguson

I feel better knowing Santa will also be unemployed after Christmas.

— Anonymous

If SANTA CLAUS came down the chimney in a f**king jogging suit, you wouldn't even know it was him.

— Wayne Coyne

Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, he must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, must be a pacifist. What's in that…

— Arlo Guthrie

The government and its chiefs do not have the powers of the mythical Santa Claus. They cannot spend except by taking out of the…

— Ludwig von Mises

“The whole concept of some stranger making his way down our chimney - not that we had one - suggested burglary more readily than…

— Thomm Quackenbush

Please be informed, there is a Santa Claus.

— Jim Lovell

Santa was a fake.

— Stephen Lawrence

One time I asked Brasky to dress up as Santa for a Christmas party I was having for my children. Anyway, Brasky shows up…

— Bill Brasky

You don't need Visa when you've got Santa.

— Anonymous